Reflections of a Baby's Mama

Blog? What blog?

2011-11-30T10:21:00.001-08:00

Well, you know you're a terrible blogger when your daughter's last birthday is still on the front page of the blog, when you've just celebrated another birthday... whoops. I cannot believe I haven't updated since JULY! Ridiculous! I'm going to pull out the excuses and say I had some good reasons for neglecting my poor blog (and heck, it's more for me and the memories than anything else).

So let's see... first there was July! Will turned one and had a cute space themed birthday party. I was a chicken with my head cut off, so the pictures are scarce. Whoops. Here's a little montage of his cake smash, though!

He had his first haircut just before his party, too- my goodness, he looked so cute! I totally cried as he got that beautiful hair trimmed, but it looked so handsome afterward that I was ok with it.
Before:

After!

Isn't he dreamy?! He is the best little guy- I adore him so stinking much. While he is nothing like his big sister was at this age, he is wonderful. He keeps me on my toes- running every where, climbing on everything and getting into all of the stuff he isn't supposed to. He is such a typical 'boy'. I can be in the worst mood and one glance at his adorable face does me in. I'm madly in love!

At the end of the month I ran in my first Mud Run- it was SO MUCH FUN! Once finished, I decided I couldn't wait to do another so I signed up for one in September! Our team name was "The Mud Flaps"... dig our trucker hats and flannels? Yeah, I know you do! It was such a muddy, messy event- I seriously had the best time. While it was a little longer than a 5k, it wasn't too hard. We did very little running actually- we spent a good amount of time just laughing, talking and slinging mud. Even Madison joined in on the fun!

August rolled in and Matt headed to Alaska with his dad and brothers for the first full week of the month. Off to catch mammoth sized halibut and salmon, the kiddies and I stayed home and did our thing. The day he left, I wasn't feeling 100%. Super tired, nauseous and... that's right, folks. Time to pee on a stick! So on the first day that Matt was going to be gone for an entire week, I found out that we're expecting baby #3! The beginning of this pregnancy was not pretty. I felt so much sicker than I ever did with Kate or Will. Way sicker. I felt horrible for the kids; I'd just put Will down for his nap, give Kate the iTouch in our bed and lay down, praying they'd get their mommy back soon. It was ugly. The nausea passed around week 13 and the second trimester has been great. Matt and the boys returned home with almost 500 pounds of halibut and salmon. That's right- FIVE HUNDRED POUNDS! It has been a delicious few months ever since!

In September, Kate headed back to school! She had been waiting for it all summer- she loves preschool! She met her new teacher, Mrs. Benson, and had a great time.

October started out with a girls' trip to Honolulu! My sister in law and her girls where on their own while her husband was deployed, so Kate and I went and spent a week in the warm Hawaiian sun (lucky us!). The girls had so much fun together... it made it so hard to leave, knowing how much Katie misses them when they're apart. It is a lot of fun to have the three girl cousins so close in age- just wish we could be closer in location!

Halloween was adorable with our little Mickey & Minnie Mouse! We had grandma & grandpa over for pizza, did a little trick or treating and made some crafts... it becomes more and more fun each year. I'm already dreaming about what theme we'll go with when there are three little Conrad babies!

November has been a busy, fun filled month! In all honesty, I cannot believe how fast it has gone. My three favorite months of the year, October - December, go by in an instant. Katie turned four on the 18th! It is unbelievable to me that four years could have already gone by since she was born. I say it every birthday- what did we do without her!? She is so smart and funny; sassy and stubborn, too. She has this long, wavy golden hair that I cannot bring myself to trim. Her laugh is all it takes to put me in a better mood and her heart is as big as ever. I do adore my sweet girl. At the beginning of the month, she got what she had been hoping for since finding out that she would be a big sister again- we found out we're having a GIRL! Kate was so thrilled to hear that she would have a baby sister! She has been saying from the start that it's a girl- I don't think she ever had a doubt in her mind. So funny!

We threw her a fun, little Minnie Mouse birthday party to celebrate the big FOUR. It was the first party with all of her friends from school- so fun; so exhausting. The girls played dress up for most of the party, only stopping to play a couple of games and scarf down a cupcake!

Phew. So there you have it. The last 5ish months in a nutshell. We're gearing up for a great Christmas and a busy 2012!

The inspiration continues...

2011-07-11T20:46:00.000-07:00

Have I mentioned my Pinterest obsession? Yeah, clearly I have. It has been a bit troublesome for me, making my mind (and budget) wander through pins and pins of wonderful crafts, projects, home inspirations and more. I have so many different projects going right now- it's really rather ridiculous.

This one I actually started before Pinterest and finally started writing in today! Its a notebook/ journal type thing to keep on our coffeetable. There are so many times when Kate says something hilarious or Will does something noteworthy and I think to myself, "I need to write this down!" So that, my friends, is where our little coffeetable book comes in. Right on our table, I have a place to jot it down right when it happens. Today, I traced each of our hands and wrote the date. Sometimes I'll just have Kate or Will draw in it, then date it so we can look back on it.

I used ModPodge to cover a plain, black sketch book from Joann's with cute scrapbook paper, then used my Cricut to cut our last name into cute letters for the front. A ripped strip of paper and a ribbon completed the front. Now on the inside, there are pages and pages of memories waiting to be written down. On the first page, I scribbled down a quote I fell in love with about family (please excuse my high-school-girl hand writing).

I'm so excited about it! I know one day I'm going to look back on it, in tears, remembering a time when my kids still wanted to snuggle and weren't too cool to call me "mommy".

The next thing was a little chore chart for Kate. I've seen tons of these on various blogs, but decided to whip up my own to coordinate with her cute room colors. Together, we picked 5 reasonable tasks for her to accomplish each day. At the end of the week, if she gets all of her tasks checked off, we do something special. She completed last week, the first week of the chart business, with flying colors- so we had a little ice cream trip tonight. Score one for mommy, too ;-)

I made the little chart into a 16x20 print (on metallic paper for fun) and had it printed by my usual photo lab. I picked up a $3 frame at Wal-Mart and spray painted it the color I wanted. I.love.spray.paint. It looked great! Then I use a dry-erase marker, so that we can erase it and start over again the next week!

Lots of fun! I'm loving feeling inspired- even my cooking has taken a turn for the better! Ahh, I feel so domestic.

Summer time and the living is hectic.

2011-07-09T20:15:00.000-07:00

I used to dislike summer a lot. Don't get me wrong- I liked being off of school, but about a month in I always got bored and wanted to be back with my friends every day. It's so different, though, as an adult. I completely understand, now, those Staples commercials where the parents dance dreamily to "It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year". I do love having Kate home and being able to try new projects and playdates, but I do cherish that sweet little break I was getting for three days each week when she was at school and Will was snoozing. Ah well... what can you do other than make the most of it?!

I'm baffled at how busy we've been! Every time a friend leaves a voicemail, I swear it takes me a good two-three days to respond because we just never stop being busy! We've spent our summer crafting, splashing and baking away. My first stab at cake pops was, drumroll please... a success!! I made my own cake mix (take THAT Duncan Hines!) and baked away. I went into it thinking it was going to be a huge disaster, having heard from many that they're an enormous pain. I found them to be pretty simple, mostly just time consuming. I think the key, and I'm pretty sure it was really important: you MUST refrigerate your balls! Yeah, I kind of hope you were reading that aloud in public somewhere... not going to lie. ;-) Seriously, though. After rolling them up, dipping the sticks in the melted candy and inserting the stick, I chilled those bad boys for a good 45 minutes. Once the second half of the batch waiting to be dipped started to come back to room temp, I started having problems and threw them back in the fridge for another 15 minutes. I still have plenty of learning to do, but they were fun! This is the yellow cake recipe I used- it was pretty good. Not crazy sweet, so it wasn't overwhelming when mixed with the frosting + the candy melt coating.

Basic Yellow Cake

2 1/4 cups all-purpose flour (do not sift the flour)
1 1/2 cups granulated sugar
3 1/2 teaspoons baking powder
1-teaspoon salt
1 1/4 cups milk
Vegetable oil
1 stick butter (not margarine), softened
1-tablespoon vanilla extract
3 large eggs

Preheat oven to 350°
- In a large mixing bowl combine the flour, sugar, baking powder and salt, mixing well.
- Measure the 1-1/4 cups of milk in a 2 cup measuring cup….then add enough vegetable oil to bring the liquid up to 1-1/3 cups.
- Add the milk/vegetable oil mixture, butter and vanilla to the flour mixture and beat with an electric mixer on medium to medium-high speed for 2 minutes, scraping sides of bowl as needed.
- Add the eggs and continue beating an additional 2 minutes. Pour batter into prepared pans.
- Bake at 350° in a 9x13 pan for 25 to 30 minutes or until a wooden pick inserted near center of cake comes out clean, or until cake springs back when touched lightly in the center.
- Cool cake on wire racks for 15 minutes; remove from pan and cool completely.

Easy peasy.

My project- or possibly obsession- right now is getting everything together for Will's first birthday party! I'm gathering space related fun stuff and planning away! What post would be complete without a few photos- so here is the one for his invitation...

Pretty delicious little guy, no? And of course, his big sister made sure she was going to be involved in his photo shoot.

Goodness I love them.

Finally, I've officially decided to do an almost completely DIY Christmas this year. Every January I started to have heart palpitations waiting for the credit card bill to arrive, knowing full well what the balance is going to be and knowing full well the sound my husband will make when he opens it. I can actually feel my chest tighten just thinking about it. So- having fallen deeply in love with Pinterest and being armed with thousands of incredible project ideas, I have decided. DIY it is. The kids and husband are excluded... but everyone else, be forewarned- I am putting a lot of heart and soul into this Christmas, so smile like you mean it when you open your gift!

Being a tourist.

2011-06-22T09:11:00.000-07:00

Last week we ran around like crazy people, squeezing in way too much in one week. Having grown up in Southern California, I've done the SD Zoo, Seaworld and Disneyland many, many times. But never all in one week. Tourists must be exhausted (and broke) after squeezing all of that into one vacation.

My mom took a much needed, much anticipated vacation for herself down to San Diego. So the kiddies and I spent two nights down there with her and hit up the zoo on Monday and Seaworld on Tuesday. I've done both of those with Kate before, but this time was the most fun since she's old enough now to appreciate and be excited about it. Will? Well, he couldn't really care less, but that's ok- he's still free ;-)

Wednesday was Kate's last day of preschool, which meant a big, fun ice cream party and then onto Disneyland for Friday and Saturday. We had military passes, which give you three days to use in the park. We'd done one day back in March and had two more, so with Matt's sister in town with the girls we decided we'd all use up our days and go have some fun with these little ladies. Watching the parades and seeing the characters with 3 and 5 year old girls is so much fun. The wonder in the their little faces is completely perfect. The second day, we had dinner at Ariel's Grotto and the girls all got to meet Ariel, Snow White, Belle, Cinderella and Aurora. Oh my goodness. I've never seen Kate so awestruck. As the other girls babbled on and on to CInderella about her movie, Kate just stood there watching then suddenly blurted, "I LOVE YOU!" in an incredibly awkward, but perfectly precious way. Sigh. Childhood innocence at it's finest. Pics coming soon...

I think we might have to get passes... I just love seeing my sweetheart experience all that magic!

Catching up.

2011-06-09T09:39:00.000-07:00

Wow. So much for being better about blogging. Four months have passed and we've been busy as ever. I feel like changes to my littles happen so quickly. It's only been four months, but looking at the pics from that last post, they have gotten so much bigger in such a small period of time!

Kate is this smart, inquisitive little girl- certainly not a baby anymore- who loves Tangled, playing with her toy kitchen and can make her brother laugh more than anyone else can. Her smile almost literally lights up a room and her laugh is crazy contagious.

We had a parenting milestone this week as we received our first call from school that our little girl had been hurt. The phone call was fairly dramatic, but the situation didn't pan out to be as serious as they made it sound on the phone. I suppose they have to cover their bases, but really? I cried the whole way over to the school praying she was ok. As it turned out, she slammed her finger in a door in the bathroom on the playground. It looked pretty gnarly, and there must have been a pretty good amount of blood. When the teacher went to put a bandaid on it, she passed out cold and somehow hit her head on the way down. By the time I got there, she was still ghost white, but they said she looked a lot better. My poor girl. She was so quiet and sleepy. We took her home, and after a lengthy conversation with the doctor on the phone, everything checked out fine and she slept off the trauma of the day.

Ahh. So begins a lifetime of worry for my babies' safety.

Will is getting into his own trouble, crawling around everywhere and pulling up on anything and everything. He's such a funny, curious little man. It's so much fun to have one of each- my son is amazing. Still makes me laugh how terrified I was to have a boy- he is more than I could have ever hoped for. His hair is definitely one of those things people will always remember about him as a baby. We get stopped at least twice every time we go to the store with someone commenting on his hair or asking to touch it. It is pretty fantastic.

As for me, my newest addiction is the website Pinterest. There are so many inspiring ideas for crafts and food and home... its all too much. It has moved me to do a few quick crafts while Kate is at school and Will is napping... I made some little summer wreaths for our front doors out of a super cheapie tshirt:

Then I just made some quick little flowers to stick on there.

I've also been setting aside baby food jars in case I thought of something to do with them... so I threw some ribbon and raffia around them and used them on the table with candles and some flowers. It looked super cute!

So these were fairly harmless crafts... but I have to say, that site is putting all these ideas in my head of BIG projects for our house. I have a vision in my head of what we could do to our kitchen and phew... guess we better start saving! It does feel good to be inspired though... baby steps!

I've been running a lot, and have run two 5k races now... woo! I have always hated running, but as it turns out, its not so bad of you really give it a try. I'm super excited for the Irvine Lake Mud Run in July... need to find someone to take photos while we make messes of ourselves. I was getting super discouraged that I wasn't losing weight... until I went to buy a new pair of jeans. Guess who went down a size? Ha!

And just in time for me to finish putting in my little update, I can hear Will upstairs telling me he's done snoozing... time to start our day!

February already?!

2011-02-04T09:33:00.000-08:00

2011 is already flying by! And once again, I have neglected my poor little blog. I have been keeping up really well with my 365 Project, though, so that's a plus: http://alisonkay365.blogspot.com!

Kate is thoroughly enjoying pre-school! We've enjoyed it, too- we've had fun visiting for the pet parade, getting grandma & grandpa involved for Grandparent's Day and seeing her sing "The Butterfly Song" with her schoolmates at Saturday night service at the church affiliated with the school. I've had that sweet song stuck in my head for the entire month:
"You gave me a heart and you gave me a smile,
You gave me Jesus and you made me your child,
But I just thank you, Father, for making me ME!"
Ahh- thank you, indeed. She is amazing.

Adorable! Today is "Crazy Hair Day" and I am very excited to get her ready to go :) Speaking of hair, this past month we took a big step and got bangs cut! She looks like such a big girl... and so much like me when I was that age. Crazy!

We've spent a lot of time outside, as the weather has been amazing for January! Her activity of choice these days? Painting. My little lady may be the next great artist of the 21st century.

Will is growing and changing so fast- I cannot believe he is 6 months old already. Half a year? Where did it go?

He is definitely already a mama's boy- screaming and crying like he's being tortured if I hand him off to anyone- including Matt or grandma. Kate was never like that- she was so interested in everyone and very social. Will just wants to be with me. Just me. No one else. I guess it's kind of sweet... until my arm starts to go numb from carrying around all 20lbs. of him all of the time. He really does have the sweetest personality- he loves watching his big sister (she makes him laugh so hard) and touching faces. He has the two cutest little teeth sticking out of those bottom gums and his smile is killer :)

Just this morning, I noticed him starting to pull himself to face the direction he wants to face (scooting). He is no where near crawling, but getting close to learning the art of the scoot for sure! I'm already starting to plan and ponder his first birthday party- yikes!

Matt and I are celebrating our 6th anniversary on Saturday and I seriously feel like we *just* celebrated #5! What a ride! The first two years of our marriage seem so long ago- no kids, less craziness- but the years as parents have been so full and sweet. I wouldn't trade it for anything. Still, I do look forward to going out tonight, just he and I, for dinner as husband and wife. We need that every now and again to continue connecting and being a team for our kids.

Life is busy, but so full of joy!

Behind.

2011-01-02T20:28:00.000-08:00

Haven't posted since November? Well. That speaks a lot about how life has been for the last few months. It's a new year- welcome 2011- and I am happy to be out of 2010. While 2010 brought us wonderful things like buying our first home and our sweet William, one of my greatest joys- it also seems as though it was a super tough year.

I heard the word 'cancer' one too many times from one too many people I care about deeply. I hate that word. I'm tired of the phone calls letting me know that someone I care about has been 'diagnosed' with that wicked 'c' word. In August, on Will's one month birthday, we said goodbye to Matt's beloved Aunt Eloise as she lost her battle with lung cancer (the woman who never touched a smoke in her life). She'd been diagnosed less than a year before we lost her. While we all miss her so much (I miss her even more than I expected I would), we could rejoice that her faith was so strong, and that she is no doubt laughing that contagious laugh of hers in heaven with Jesus.

Aside from the tough stuff, we got our precious son. Will is now 5 months old and more amazing every day. He's rolling now, reaching for stuff (especially faces) and has the best laugh ever! My favorite thing is that Kate makes him laugh harder than anyone- its awesome!

Kate completely adores him, too. She is such a good big sister- aside from the occasional over-enthusiastic hug she tries to give him here and there. She's been a little chef since Christmas, working diligently at her new toy kitchen. This Christmas was the most fun I've had in a long time... she is just old enough now to really get it and be excited. She came down the steps in the morning and RAN to that kitchen! Then she opened her set of 7 princess dolls and it was all over. Life was complete!

Will had a rough first Christmas- bronchitis, nearing pneumonia. Yuck. So with some antibiotics, steroids and breathing treatments he avoided the pneumonia and is back on the healthy side now. Phew!

She started school the week before Christmas break on a trial basis and went back for her first day of 2011 today. She loves it! She has so much fun... and brings home a new painting every time. Love it!

The first two days, she didn't want to leave. Most kids don't want their moms to drop them off- mine didn't want me to pick her up. She screamed and threw a fit because she wanted to stay and play! Unreal. The first day was so crazy and overwhelming for her... she sobbed the whole way home and when we got home, dramatically announced that she was "Just sooooo tired!!!!". I told her to go lay in bed if she was so tired (didn't think she'd really sleep) and next thing I know:

Done for. SO exhausted. It's gotten better, though, and now she is a trooper. I love that she loves school!

On my front, I am officially a stay at home mom! My time at the church ended on Dec. 31st and I am relieved. It will be so nice to have the extra time and so much less stress. I'm really excited about putting more time and energy into my photography journey, too! I'm hoping to do more business this year, meet new clients, grow as a photographer and really do this thing!

I'm super excited for 2011... lets see what you've got, new year!

Three.

2010-11-18T11:33:00.000-08:00

Well, sweet girl... today you're three. Three years old. How in the world have three years gone by already? And if its passed so quickly, how can I barely remember what like was like before there was you? Daddy and I are always amazed at how much you added to our lives. We'd be so incomplete, so lonely and frankly, so bored without you!

You're my first baby... the baby I held at minutes old, counting all your fingers and toes and marveling over this amazing creation. I remember how your arrival deepened my faith in God so very much... something as perfect as a newborn baby could only come from the Maker's hands.

Today, three years later, you're a loving big sister. You cannot get enough of playing dress up. You love princess and passionately sing into a hairbrush in front of the mirror. You love music. Your sweetness shines through when you tell me, "Mommy, you're my best friend... I love you so much in the whole world!!". Your sassiness also shows. You're dramatic already!

I'm a sucker for you, little girl! I love you!

Chocolate chip pancake for breakfast!

Her new American Girl doll and matching jammies!

Picaboo Book

2010-10-23T09:06:00.000-07:00

Do you Groupon? I do! Every day, in every city, there is a special deal that offers awesome discounts on everything from food, to lodging, to classes... and beyond. It's fantastic! A month or so ago, Picaboo was offering $100 worth of their product for only $25. I hit the "BUY" button and excitedly downloaded the software to get started on Kate's first year album!

I had every intention of doing an amazing, elaborate scrapbook for her. I have the paper. The stickers. All the knick-knacks. And.... no time or energy for it. So, I thought this would be a good compromise- and Picaboo did not disappoint! They have all kinds of "scrapbook" looking backgrounds and great layouts for the photos. The flat fee goes up to 20 pages- well, her book was over 80 pages, so there was a little extra cost involved, but with the Groupon it was all good!

I was SO pleased when our book arrived! Here are some photos- they don't do the real thing justice!

There was recently another Groupon for Picaboo- $35 for $100 worth of product. Guess who will be making another book soon???

Dropped the blogging ball...

2010-10-22T21:35:00.000-07:00

Ok, I've been busy... but nonetheless- I've been a blogging slacker. I was so much better at this when Kate was my newbie. But here we are- Will is fast approaching 3 months old and I haven't posted anything in months!

Let's see... catching up...
Things are going well and still, every day, I feel truly blessed! The fall has been awesome! We've spent lots of time pumpkin patching and enjoying the very unusual cool weather we've been having! I can't remember an October that it has been so cool and rainy- and I have loved every minute! Though I did get a new jogging stroller and am itching to take the kids out for a good walk!

Will is doing great- getting so big and sweet! He isn't much for sleeping... we're still up about every two hours at night. Yikes. Right around 3 months is when Kate started sleeping through the night... I don't have such high hopes for Will. But oh well- I've recently had such a change in attitude when I think about how very fortunate we are to have a healthy baby!

Kate is growing up so fast. Her third birthday is less than a month away and I don't even know what to think. She is such a big girl.

Soon we'll be celebrating Will's baptism, as well as Kate's birthday party, on the same day! Can't wait for such a doubly blessed celebration!

In other news, I've given notice at my job! Yes... it is hard to leave, but I am feeling so lucky to have the opportunity to stay at home with my beautiful babies. I know so many mommies who would give a limb to have the opportunity to stay at home. Being a mommy is a full time job and it has been tough to balance both of my FT jobs and feel like I am giving my best to both. So, come January 2011, I'll be working as just a mommy! I can't wait to do all the things with my kids that I've wanted to do, but haven't been able to dedicate time to. I'm also looking forward to chasing my photography dream, as well!

I'm wanting to start another blog about recipes, cleaning, 'mommyness' and whatnot to 1) inspire myself and 2) get tips from others about these things. Keep an eye out for that!

One last photo opp before I shove off to bed: we had a blast doing our Halloween sugar cookies last week! It was a perfect fall day!

Back tracking...

2010-09-27T08:55:00.003-07:00

So, I never posted Will's one month photo. Whoops!

Here is our guy with his bear at one month:

And now, at two months!

Three months is just around the corner!

Glad that's over...

2010-08-22T11:12:00.000-07:00

Remember that book Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day? I could relate yesterday.

On Friday night Matt went up to be with our Andrew and the other groomsmen before Andrew's wedding on Saturday. He rode with a friend, since I'd be driving up Saturday, and was staying the night up in Torrance, so I was on my own with the two kiddos. No biggie- the night went smoothly and I was super excited to see one of my closest friends marry the love of his life.

Well, here's how my day started: as Kate is shoveling apple sauce into her mouth and I am holding Will feeding him, Kate casually looks at him and says, "He pooped." I look down, and there is a poo-spolision all over him, me, the blanket... nice. So I pull Kate from the high chair and we go upstairs to get him cleaned up and bathed. As I am attempting to clean up the poo disaster, my once almost potty trained daughter proceeds to follow suit and poop in her pull up- while sitting in the Bumbo seat that hasn't been put away yet- which causes quite a mess. So now there are two babies to clean up. I run downstairs to the trash can that desperately needs to be taken out to toss the pull-up, knock it over and a glass bottle shatters all over the kitchen floor. So at this point, the bath is running for Will, Kate has no pants or pull up on and I've got to get all the glass cleaned up.

It was at this point I thought to myself, "Today sucks so far... hope nothing else goes wrong." Whoops.

I picked up our friend, Steph, from the airport around 10:30, we had some lunch and went back to the house to get ready. That was a little more difficult than expected with an attention hungry little girl and a milk hungry little boy. We got out the door, got Kate to her grandparents (later than I wanted to of course) and went on our way up toward Torrance for the wedding. As we headed for the freeway, we saw a woman driving on a flat tire and let her know she had a flat. We're both like, "Aww man, that sucks!" and proceed to tell our stories about getting flat tires in the past.

The wedding started at 4pm, and its 3:15 as we're cruising in the carpool lane on the 405 in Irvine. Out of nowhere, it starts. Ca-thunk, ca-thunk, ca-thunk! My first thought was, "Are you freaking kidding me?!" Steph and I were both in denial at that point I think. The car wasn't driving any differently, so I didn't think it was a flat, but who knew. So we pulled over, all the while saying that it was probably just something we were dragging or something. Couldn't be the tire. I've never wished to find a small animal hanging from my tire up until this point.

It was the tire. Left front. Not flat, but with the rubber completely peeling off and the threads showing. &%@*!! Called AAA, called my husband, crying of course, because I knew we were going to miss the wedding of one of my dearest friends since high school. Not too long after, 'Frank' rolls up in the tow truck to change my tire. He takes a look at the right front tire, then the left front and let's out an, "Ohhhhhhh, that's not good." Basically it came to that the right front tire was also in such poor shape that if we put the spare on the left front, the right front would go, too. It was totally unsafe to drive the car. We needed brand new tires for the front. Also, tow trucks are not equipped to carry more than three people, so since we had Will with us, we had to drive 30mph to the tire place with the tow truck close behind.

Matt had called his brother, who became our knight in shining armor by coming and giving us his car to use while the van got new tires. When we finally made it up to Torrance (after the phone call from the tire place that the two rear tires needed to be replaced as well), it was the cocktail hour. I went to give my hungry boy a bottle so I could at least relax for a minute and not need to breastfeed right away, but of course the bottle liners were in the van (along with the Baby Bjorn I'd intended to have on hand). Perfect. We'd decided to leave the van overnight and pick it up in the morning, so Matt's brother could get picked up and not have to wait around for it.

The reception was fun- our good friend's mom held Will for most of the time that he wasn't eating, which meant some fun with friends for us. We headed out around 9pm to go pick up Kate from Matt's parents. Guess what else was in the van with the bottle liners and carrier? Her car seat. Fortunately for us, his parents have one sitting in their garage. Phew. Disaster averted. So about half way home from their house, Matt breaks the silence with an, "Ohhh!" of horrified realization: "Did you grab the house key when you left the van?" %^&($^%#^%$&^&*!!!! Seriously?! We were locked out of our house at 10:15 at night, completely exhausted and with two little ones. Luckily, I remembered that I'd left one window unlocked. Matt would have to do some climbing, but it might work. And it did. I half expected the police to show up the way things were going at this point. But we got in the house, got the kids to bed and completely crashed.

I have to say, that amid all the crap of the day, I was so thankful for good friends and my sweet, wonderful husband who never fails to make me feel better when the poo hits the fan. Phew! What a day! Glad that today is a new one!

Today, now that it is all behind me, its actually all quite funny... glad I can laugh about it now!

I Was Wrong...

2010-08-15T08:11:00.000-07:00

While I was pregnant with Will, I was secretly terrified that I wouldn't be able to love Will like I loved Kate. Not that he wouldn't be loved... but that I love her so intensely, so completely and so deeply that it would be impossible for my heart to double that love. I was scared about the boy thing, too... would it be different? Would I connect emotionally with a baby boy like I did our baby girl?

I am relieved to find that what they say is true- your heart grows. I'm wildly in love with my daughter AND my son. Last night was a sweet one. Will was a rockstar sleeper, and Kate stayed in bed until about 6:30am when she came in to our bed. I spent the 4am hour nursing little man and swooning over his perfectness, which meant he was back in his bed when Kate came to snuggle and I was able to dwell on her sweet blonde curls, her long eyelashes and her snuggly personality. Heaven.

The past three weeks have gone by lightening fast. Will had made it back to birth weight at 2 weeks (woohoo!) and judging by the way he's been eating this week, I'm betting he's far surpassed that by now. His umbilical cord stump fell off at 10 days old (5 days more than his sister's) and it was far less terrifying for me than it was when Kate's fell off. Guess its that second child thing. Sadly, I can tell his hair is already thinning out- I don't want it to go! It's so cute... especially right out of the bath.

I took his newborn pics at 9 days- though I tried at 6 days and failed- and it was fun to shoot my own little guy. Now I'm fighting the battle to pick/ design his birth announcement. I'm so much pickier since taking up photography and I want something unique... I just can't create anything I am thrilled with right now. Oh well... guess I'll find something!

As far as post-partum stuff goes, I am feeling great. Some pre-pregnancy clothes; but certainly not all, are fitting again which feels good. Breastfeeding still hurts a bit, which is a bummer... I thought for sure it'd be a piece of cake this time. Its liveable, though. Emotionally, I've got it together and am really enjoying this time in my life. Matt is doing well- going back to work this coming week and we're feeling pretty confident in our life with two!

Party of Four- Will's birth!

2010-07-31T08:43:00.000-07:00

Its official- the Conrads are a foursome!

So my last post touches on just the beginning of the many phone calls I made to Hoag on Sunday. I called, as instructed, at 5am... was told to call back at 8am. The nurse didn't sound stressed and I assumed she'd give us the green light to come in after the next call. That was where I made a fatal error: assuming it would all go my way. I called at 8:00 sharp, to be told "Call back at 11:00- we're just busy." At 11am, I figured 'third time is a charm'... FAIL. Was told to call again at 2pm. And at 2pm- guess what?! "Call back at 5pm." At that point, I was in tears calling my mom to tell her, yet again, to keep waiting. I was emotionally drained and so tired from being up at 5am! Matt was getting antsy and wanted me to start calling every hour instead of waiting until 5, which really just got me more upset... so I called a little early at 4:20. Sweet success- kind of: she said they wanted me to come in at 8pm! BUT- I needed to call right before we left to be sure. Yikes.

Since they'd be watching Kate anyway that night (assuming 8pm stuck), we went down to Matt's parents' house and had some yummy dinner. I went outside and called at 6:30pm, with the rest of the family crossing their fingers and staring at me through the window. "Come on in!" YES! A little later and we gave Kate 100 kisses and headed out.

We got to L&D at 7:50pm and checked in, signed papers, changed into my ever-so-attractive hospital gown. I was 3cm dilated and 60% effaced at that point. I joked with our nurse, Kristen (who was fantastic!) that I was more nervous about the IV than anything else... my IV experience with Kate was no bueno. It hurt like no other! She, however, said she'd give me a shot of linocain first so I wouldn't feel a thing. That was the beginning of a beautiful relationship with my L&D nurse! We got that all done and then since I had tested positive for GBS, I needed a couple of bags of anti-biotics before they'd start the pitocin. Did you know penicillin BURNS?! Yeah, oww. It hurt all the way up my arm. I even asked if I was having a heart attack or something because of the intense stabbing pain in my arm... no fun!

They started the pitocin at 10:15pm and I could feel the contractions start, but they weren't painful. At 10:40pm a doctor came in a broke my water. Even though I remember this from the first time, it still shocked me just how gross it felt! Ugh! I cannot imagine that happening in public! Once my water was broken, the contractions picked up quick and started becoming painful. Matt and I tried to rest (he had no problem...). I was checked again and was 6-7cm dilated at that point. We flipped on the TV, but as it turns out, there isn't anything good on at that time of night on a Sunday. By midnight, I was hurting, nauseous and ready for that glorious direct line of relief in my back. Bring me the epi! The anesthesiologist, who I am fairly certain was the same one I had with Kate, came in and took good care of me. Matt came to hold my hand, but casually walked away at a certain point- playing it real cool for a guy who thought he might pass out. Doc got the line in, made sure I was well numbed up and went on his merry way. Now it was resting time!

I tried to sleep as much as possible, but the nurse kept coming in, checking my progress and making me move around and switch sides, since Will's heartbeat would suddenly disappear from their monitors. Turns out he was much happier when I laid on my right side. My OB, Dr. Grouse, came in to say 'hi' and after that I think I got some sleep. The nurse came in somewhere around 2:30am and said she was going to give me a straight catheter to empty my bladder- she thought that would help him move down the rest of the way. She was right.

Almost immediately after she did that, I felt a ton of pressure. She checked me and said I was 9.5cm and still had a little bit to go before it was push time. She said if I felt lots of pressure to call her and then left. Not even 2 minutes later I told Matt I thought I needed to call her back... it was all I could do NOT to push. She came back and checked me again and I had made it to 10cm and ready to start pushing that quick! She and Matt started me pushing. Poor Matt. He is the sweetest man in the world... I just love him. But I know the whole thing made him a bit queasy.

After a few sets of practice pushes, the nurse interrupted us in the middle of a push and said, "Ok- we better stop and call the doctor now." At that point it was so much pressure with every contraction... it was unreal. I didn't feel ANY of that with Kate! Dr. Grouse arrived and we got down to business. I pushed for three ten-counts. "Push harder!" With another push, he was crowning (ow), second push head was out (ow oww ow!) and third push (and I pushed freaking hard) William Robert was born at 3:22am! The doctor practically threw that kid on my belly to get him cleaned up and I met the new man in my life! He was so quiet! He really didn't cry, but the nurses weren't concerned at all... he was breathing fine and let out a squeak here and there and they were all saying how cute he was.

He weighed in at 8 pounds, 8 ounces and was 20 inches long. He had all kinds of dark hair and had the sweetest little nose. So in love!

As the doc was pushing on my belly and doing that fun part, I could see Matt sitting there holding him and just smiling this amazed, joyful smile that I will never forget. It wasn't something I got a photo of, but it is a memory in my mind that only I will ever have- my husband and his son. So perfect. This photo was a little later, and still so sweet.

The stitching up part hurt. Kind of a lot. I don't know what was up with my epidural at that point, but I had felt a lot during the delivery. When he was crowning, it hurt so much... I seriously cannot believe that women can do that without any pain meds. It's incredible to me. Then I could feel every stitch at the end. Ughhh... makes me shudder even thinking about it again. But it wasn't all that bad; very minor tear below- and I came out of it with a beautiful son!

One thing that was lovely this time- having him in the middle of the night! No one else there but us. No one standing outside waiting to come in, no one to entertain, no one to pass the baby to. If and when we do this again, I feel like requesting that no one come until we call. It was so peaceful and wonderful. It was exciting with Kate to know everyone was there and we felt so loved, but it was a whirlwind.

The visitors that did come the next day were so welcome though- especially the big sister! I was so happy to see her sweet face walk into the room! I've never been as in love with her as I am now!

Poor Kate was showing some signs of a cold, so Matt's mom and sister took her home pretty quick, so we didn't get a pic of the four of us at the hospital, but at least we got one with daddy, mommy and Will...

Will is awesome and I feel great. We left the hospital a day before we had to because I just wanted to be at home! Emotionally, I feel 100% normal, which is strange. I was a hormonal wreck when I came home with Kate. This time I feel cool as a cucumber... it almost creeps me out that I feel so normal. My body is still a bit sore, but I am really looking forward to getting out and taking walks with my two children! Kate is doing so well. She loves to give him kisses and is so sweet. She is definitely acting up a bit with us, but nothing intolerable. Poor kid- it is a huge change in her life! Nursing is easier this time, but still painful for a bit, and the nights aren't as long as I feared they could be!

This morning I woke up to his tiny, pre-cry sounds and for a few moments was able to close my eyes and thank God for all of the incredible blessings I've been given in my life. I'm just in awe of my beautiful family and all that we have been given. Can't believe that just when I think 'my cup runneth over', it continues to flow! Amazing!

Induction Day is Here

2010-07-25T07:45:00.000-07:00

Today is the day we meet Will! Well, hopefully. I was to call Hoag L&D between 5-6am this morning to check the status of my scheduled 7am induction. I was told to call back at 8am. It's now 7:50am and I am praying this next phone call doesn't end with "Call back at..." I had a dream last night that they couldn't admit me and finally around 1:30 in the afternoon they just sent me home and said they couldn't do it today. So, of course, the dream is still spinning around the back of my mind!

My feelings right now... I'm nervous and anxious, but excited. It's a struggle to eat breakfast right now- I'm hungry and won't be allowed to eat anything else after I'm admitted, but going into it knowing that more than likely I'll be looking at this food again in a little pink kidney shaped dish in several hours is a little tough on the appetite. I'm anxious about Kate- mostly about how she is going to react when I'm not at home tonight. Last night she woke up crying around 11pm and when I asked what was wrong, she said "I missed you, mommy." Sweet? You bet. But just a tad heartbreaking knowing that I'll be away the next couple of nights. I know she is in good hands with grandparents and daddy... it's just the mommy guilt thing.

I can hear that she just woke up, so I'll go snuggle her for a few more minutes then make call #2 to L&D. Let's get this show on the road!

William is coming soon!

2010-07-20T12:12:00.000-07:00

That's right, folks- we finally picked a name! Our son will be William Robert. It was a battle, but we finally buckled down and decided! If I had my way, we'd call him Liam... but, it looks like I won't be getting my way, so Will it is! I do love the nickname Will, so I can't complain, but I just love Liam. Oh well... can't win them all! It's nice to have the name chosen finally!

My due date is July 27th (a week from today), but if Will doesn't make his appearance this week then I will be induced on Sunday, the 25th first thing in the morning. Phew! It's so close! Now, last time they scheduled an induction for me (pregnant with Kate), I never made it to my induction date. However, I was also a week overdue the day I delivered... so it is totally likely I'll make it to the induction. I do like the element of surprise and going into labor spontaneously, but since I am already dilated and effaced, I am not opposed to the induction.

So this time next week, we'll have our little man! Looking forward to being a family of four!

His room is all finished and looks pretty darn good considering all the DIY stuff I did... I'm really happy with it!

Preggasaurus Rex

2010-07-06T10:29:00.000-07:00

That pretty much sums up how I feel today... like a big, beastly creature walking around all awkwardly. Though I've been tremendously tired, I actually feel *pretty* good, all in all. I really have no room to complain. Yes, I'm exhausted. Yes, I am struggling to find shirts that don't expose the bottom part of my belly. And, yes, going up a set of stairs puts me horribly out of breath. But you know? I've had a darn good 37 weeks without complication or fear.

One thing I definitely forgot about pregnancy after Kate was born- the hiccups! But the moment he had them, it all came back to me. The rhythmic twitching of my belly instantly reminded me of how giggly I'd get when Kate would have the hiccups in there. I always felt, and still feel, bad for my baby! I hate the hiccups! Supposedly, it doesn't bother the baby, though. This poor kid has the hiccups more than anyone I know!

Kate has been paying a lot more attention to my belly the last few days, and talking about the baby more... asking "Where is baby brother?" and telling me that she is going to read books to him. "Sam I Am... Horton... Peek-a-Boo Baby..." I wish I could get her on camera saying it because it is so precious how much thought she puts in to which books she'll read to him. She'll pull up my shirt while we're on the couch and just leave her hand on my belly while she watches something else. She'll put her finger on my belly button and ask if that is where he comes out. It's all too sweet. I feel bad that she really has no idea how her life is about to change in the next month or so... she's been our world- calling the shots and getting all the attention. I know she'll be fine, but is it normal to have a little mommy guilt about rocking her world this way? I have to assume so.

One month to go!

2010-06-26T07:29:00.000-07:00

At almost 36 weeks now, I am still not totally prepared for the arrival of our second little one. It seems like this pregnancy has flown by so quickly! His room is about half finished, which is fine really since he'll probably be in our room for sometime, but it would be nice to at least have it ready so I could feel like I did as much for him as I did for Kate! We're still not 100% sure on a name, but looks like we're getting closer... hopefully that gets solved soon!

Kate is doing great- growing and changing and becoming a "little girl" instead of a baby or toddler. In the past month, she has really jumped on the potty training bandwagon and is doing really well (minus a few accidents when she is too engrossed in playing). I think we're well on our way to not having two in diapers... phew!

Currently, one of her favorite places is Trader Joe's- there are always stickers waiting for her at the check stand, which she quickly removes from the paper backing and puts on her face and says, "Mommy- I have polka dots all oooover me!" She's pretty fun.

Home Sweet Home

2010-05-20T17:12:00.000-07:00

I realized the other night that I had completely spaced on putting up pics of our new place! The were really all taken when we first moved in, so things have come a little further (and become slightly messier, ha)... but at least you get the idea!

So distracted.

2010-05-15T22:00:00.001-07:00

I've been super ADD recently. I just can't focus. And I finally take some time to update the ol' blog and get horribly distracted reading everyone else's blogs... suddenly its 10pm and I have to force myself to actually focus on the task at hand and update! Life has been BUSY! I guess I kind of like it that way, though as I get more and more pregnant I'm finding myself getting pretty exhausted at the end of every day.

Mother's day was beautiful and I woke up to a yummy breakfast and my gorgeous gift from my loves hanging on our lower patio:

Beautiful, right?! I am loving them! In fact, I'll take this opportunity to say that I am completely, 100% head over heels in love with our home. Not just the material part of our home, but everything we're building as a family here. I love being in the backyard with Matt at the barbecue, rose bushes all around, bougainvilleas in full bloom over the fountain, Kate playing on her trike... its almost unreal sometimes. Just when I think I could be complaining about something, God reminds me that I have more things to be thankful for than I can even count.

I dared to attempt snapping a good picture of Kate for my mom for M-day and after a few rounds of peek-a-boo and some silly noises, was able to get just one to have a float wrap made for her!

The float wrap is soooo cool and now I am trying to pick some photos to have a bunch made for the main wall in our living room. Part of me wants to wait until I have some photos of our new addition, but I can always add more later, right?

We're almost at 30 weeks pregnant now and it's time for the every-two-week doctor's appointments now. I remember that with Kate, that was when it became really real. They were keeping an eye on me- and it wouldn't be much longer. While a few weeks back I was totally gun-ho about starting the nursery, I have now done a 180. Oops. Guess I should've jumped on it while I had it in me. With everything else that has been going on, I just haven't gotten there yet. The paint is purchased and sitting in the garage, the sewing machine and fabric are on the table waiting for me to fire it up and the pieces of the mobile are ready to put together... just.need.motivation. It's been so perfect outside that it is so much more appealing to sit on the patio with my Matt and talk after Kate goes to bed, than to sit inside and sew.

Speaking of Matt, we got to take our first trip away this past week! In 2.5 years, we've never left Kate overnight. I've been gone, but he's been with her and vice versa, but never together. So we took our little escape to Dana Point on Monday & Tuesday and it was fabulous! We spent hours just sitting by the pool, napping and being toddler free. I'll be honest- we missed her a lot, but it was great to take some time to be husband & wife instead of mommy & daddy for a few days. It was a great reminder that we need to make date night a priority!

So all in all, things are busy- but in a good way! Next on the agenda: name this baby! Hmm... any suggestions? ;-)

Projects!

2010-04-15T10:00:00.000-07:00

Here are some pics of the projects in progress!

Putting my ideas together for the little man's nursery:

And a closer look at the fabric...

I'm completely in love with the little guitars... it's so stinking fun! I've got to take the fabric over to Lowe's to pick out a great paint color for the room. I'm hoping for a light aqua shade... I haven't decided whether I want to do a brown chair rail or not. It's a pretty small room, so I don't want to go too crazy. Might be better to keep it simple.

And after about 3 months of the unfinished letters sitting upstairs waiting for me to tackle them: Kathryn's new wall letters! I painted them to coordinate with the Target Love & Nature bedding... its so cute! The scalloped frames were a HUGE pain, but worth it in the end.

The bedding:

Week 25

2010-04-13T19:57:00.000-07:00

Whoops. I promise I didn't just drop off the face of the earth... just lagged in the blogging department. Eh.

So we're at 25 weeks through this pregnancy already and doing great! Saw the doctor today and although the number on the scale is beyond horrific, everything is going well- she said we had a pretty dramatic growth spurt this month, adding an additional 5cm to the bumpage (although that 5cm seems to equate to a lot more belly than it sounds like). I'm feeling him moving all the time and it is my fave part of pregnancy- hands down!

I'm in the planning stages of his room and somehow I decided that I am going to attempt to make his bedding on my own- ha! I found fabric that I just had to have, and being the cheapskate I am, decided that it would make way more sense for me to make it myself than to have a pro do it. We'll see how that turns out. I'm going to use this guitar fabric- Michael Miller's Groovy Guitars in Lime. The photo doesn't really do it justice- it is way cuter in person! I'm going to make a cover for the CozyWedge bumper that we already have (rather than a traditional bumper), as well as a crib skirt. Then, I'm going to put together a mobile using embroidery circles, blue, lime and brown guitar picks and small wooden guitar silhouettes. The room I am envisioning is going to be so sweet- I just hope I can pull it off!

I finally finished Kate's new wall letters to coordinate with her big girl bedding, too! I'll have to put some pics up, but they are pretty adorable if I do say so myself! Pics to come soon!

Speaking of my Kate- man that girl is growing up fast. The thought of her turning 3 in November is very difficult for me. 2 was tough- but 3 is a whole different ball game... she's becoming a little girl and saying adios to babyhood so quickly. She naps exclusively in her big girl bed now and we'll be trying out night time this weekend, now that the gate is installed at the top of the steps. I'm really struggling with that one. It feels like the crib is one of those last "baby" things. She still isn't looking too ready for potty training, so I guess there is still that... although that isn't the most pleasant remnant of babyhood. It's all so crazy. I was sorting through her clothes the other night and found her coming home outfit. It was so big on her!

And now it practically looks like doll clothing up against her. It's so cliche, but OH! it goes so fast! As much as I do miss my baby girl, I love who she is becoming. Her voice can make me smile through anything... I wish I had a recording of her asking for "more popcorn"- she pronounces every consonant so sweetly. She loves to dance and play outside and study rolly-pollys. She is fascinated by grass, flowers and dandelions. I adore that she insists on leading our meal time prayer with her sweet singing prayer... its beyond perfect. She is just so fun. And sassy- oh does that girl have sass... but I love her for it.

We had a great Easter full of family and fun... but, I completely lagged this year and didn't get one picture of her in her pretty Easter dress! I'm going to have to get an "after the fact" one, because the dress is so cute. We did go see the Bunny (in a different dress) and it was pretty funny to be honest. She didn't cry... just gave him the side-eye the whole time. She wasn't so sure about this giant bunny rocking glasses and a vest...

So things are great... Kate is beautiful, baby boy (who still remains nameless to this point) is growing strong and Matt and I are so happy in our new home! Life is good!

It's a...

2010-02-27T15:08:00.000-08:00

On Thursday, we headed out to our 18 week ultrasound... me, nervously, Matt... totally calm and collected. I think I am always a little nervous going into these ultrasounds because of the what-ifs. What if something is wrong? What if the heartbeat isn't there anymore? What if?! Matt's parents came over to hang out at house while Kate napped. After the chaos of trying to take her along to the 6 week ultrasound ("I want to lay on the table with mommy!!! Ahhhh!!!"), we weren't even going to try.

The first fumble came after I'd already removed my clothes from the waist down, and the u/s tech came in and said, "I think you're here too early. Your last u/s measurement puts you at 17 weeks 4 days- not 18 weeks." Ok. My doc never changed a due date, kept me due at July 27th, putting me at 18 weeks 2 days I think? She just told me to go between 18-20 weeks. So after some discussion, we decided to go ahead with it, and if she couldn't get what she needed then we'd just have to come back again. Fair enough.

So goo gets puts on my belly (whoever created the warmer for that stuff is genius) and the exploration begins! If you've ever had an ultrasound, you know how amazing it really is. It's this secret, sneak-peek into a world that we'd know nothing about if it weren't for technology. And to know that what you're looking at is your little baby... gets me emotional every time!

So first came all the heart stuff- everything looked good. Then she decided not to waste any time and went looking for the gender specific bits and pieces. As she passed over the little spread legs, I knew exactly what I was looking at! She said, "Yep! It's a BOY!!" and proceed to place a little arrow on the screen pointing at his manhood and type "Oh Boy!!!" onto the page. We're going to have a SON! I couldn't stop laughing for some reason! Of course I was a weeping mess, but just couldn't stop giggling. With Kate, I didn't really know what to expect. I had no intuition. This time, I felt like it would be a boy... but my intuition on these things is usually so bad I didn't take much stock in it. But YAY! We're so thrilled! After getting myself to stop giggling like an idiot, we saw all his arms, legs, feet, toes and more. Always amazing.

He's got his little arm laid over his face, so above his face you kind of see his arm and hand. Isn't he handsome? ;-)

It was so fun to tell the family- this will be grandbaby #6 for Matt's parents, but only the second grandson. Back in December when we told our families we were expecting, my grandpa said he was hoping for a boy, so we'd have one of each (keep in mind, with the first pregnancy he wanted a little girl and got his wish). So he was completely thrilled. My mom is over the moon and its just all so sweet.

I've felt him move a few times, but nothing consistent yet. I'm not in as big of a rush this time, knowing that I'll soon spend a few months begging him to stop kicking my bladder, elbowing my pelvis and kicking my ribs. :)

I have a feeling names are going to be tougher for us to agree on this time... but that's okay. We still have some time. Now to start looking at room decor and preparing Kate for the arrival of her baby brother!

We're so incredibly blessed. I say it all the time, but I mean it: My cup runneth over!

Sometimes a girl needs her mommy.

2010-02-23T20:19:00.000-08:00

I'm 27 years old, and tonight, I knew the only thing that was going to calm me down and make me stop crying was calling my mommy. Even as an adult, sometimes I just need mom. I'm pregnant, emotional, exhausted and my patience was wearing incredibly thin with Kate tonight. After hours of whining, demanding things be done her way, and crying all the way home from Grandma's because she didn't get to close the front door the way she wanted to close it, bedtime was a trial. I can tell lately that she is trying to keep me in the room with her longer and longer each night- always needing to revisit certain pages of Goodnight Moon, sing ABC one more time, etc. Once in her crib in a fairly decent mood, I tucked her in, did our normal routine and as I began to leave the room, she began frantically crying that she wanted her book in a certain spot. Thinking she'd move it and be ok, I closed the door... leaving her PISSED and SCREAMING like someone was stabbing a knife into her repeatedly or something. I mean s-c-r-e-a-m-i-n-g.

Now for the bad mom part. I did the first thing that came to mind. Stormed into her room and yelled at her to stop yelling! Nice, Alison. Way to keep it together. Grabbed her from her crib, tried to calm her down, put her book where she wanted it, put her back in bed and left the room again. She was fine. I; however, was not.

If you've ever experienced Mommy Guilt, you know what I am talking about. That feeling that what you've just done has officially scarred your child for the rest of their lives. Now, looking at it written down, it doesn't seem nearly as bad as I made it out to be. But between hormones and exhaustion, I spent the next 10 minutes crying uncontrollably about what a terrible mommy I am for reacting so angrily. Matt is at a meeting and wasn't here to talk down my crazies, so I did the only thing I could think of- called Mom. After patiently listening to my ranting about "how could I get angry at a 2-year-old for being a 2-year-old?" and "what if all she remembers tomorrow is me yelling at her?", my mom calmly asked me, "Do you remember every time I yelled at you?" Hmm... no. Guess not. "And of all the memories you have from being little, do the times I yelled at you haunt you?" No, not so much. And not 5 minutes into the conversation, I am calm, sniffling and feeling much better.

Man, I love my mom.

20 minutes later, I hear Kate crying in her room and decide I just have to go in, shush her, tell her I love her so much, and get her calm. All it took was pulling her blankie back over her, rubbing her back and "Goodnight, mommy loves you..." and she was happy again and we both felt better.

Harder the second time?

2010-01-28T15:59:00.001-08:00

I don't know if it's just that I don't remember it being tough when I was pregnant with Kate, but I'm fairly certain that being pregnant this time around is considerably more difficult. Maybe it's chasing a two year old around. Maybe it's that I'm not in as good shape as I was with her. Maybe it's just that every pregnancy is different. Or maybe it's a combination of all of those things. Whatever the case, I am finding pregnancy number two to be a little rougher.

Nonetheless, I am thankful. Being a mommy has always been one of the answers to "What do you want to be when you grow up?" for me, so to double that title is a huge blessing. Last week I had my check up and we heard baby's sweet heartbeat rockin' away at 156 bpm. Almost spot on with what K's was about that week... funny! The old wive's tales say that fetal heart rates over 140 bpm = girl, but my instinct says 'boy' this time. Now, I guess it kind of did with K, too, and we know how that came out, so we'll see. We have a little online baby pool going on and only 3 out of the 14 guesses are for a girl! Won't we all feel silly if it's another girl? Well- 50% chance! We will find out on February 25th... I CAN'T WAIT!

We're in the exciting, but exhausting, process of moving! We got our keys last week and Matt has been over there doing all kinds of work getting it ready for us to move on up. Still to be done: paint our room, paint Kate's room, install new shower in master, install new bathroom vanities, buy some furniture, install wainscoting in breakfast nook and... move. Oh... that last one is going to be a lot of work. We've got to be out of our current place by February 11th, which originally seemed like a ton of time... now, all of a sudden, he first of the month is less than a week away and I am panicking! I hate packing everything up! Luckily, we can start gradually moving things over there as we want, so that should take some pressure off... as long as I actually get on it. It is very exciting, though... it feels great to finally be making a place OURS, you know? Painting where we want and making any changes we feel up for. Love it! The adventure of home ownership begins!

And since I've been terrible about taking pics of the girl... here are a couple of crappy ones from my phone. Home shopping at Cost Plus ( sweet hat, no?) and hanging out on the steps at the new place (stairs will be a whole new adventure!).

So much for slowing down after the holidays...

2010-01-13T16:05:00.000-08:00

You know how you go through a really busy time, and tell yourself, "It will calm after XYZ...". Well, I think I have been saying that for about 6 months. Seriously.

And, just when I told myself in early November that everything would slow down after the holidays, I found out that we're pregnant again! Well, I am pregnant... Matt is just along for the gig. So shortly before Thanksgiving, we found out. Exciting!

Once we knew this information, and had an ultrasound where our little one's heartbeat was good and strong, we started thinking about our house and that we're already so overrun with Kate's stuff... we'd be needing to make a move. So the house hunting began. We looked at a couple of different places, put in an offer on one, got outbid, and started over again. Recently, we found a place we really liked, and they accepted our offer! We're in escrow right now, but soon we'll be homeowners! So exciting!

So... in the near future we'll be moving. I'm unbelievably excited, but it is still moving. Moving is never all that fun. It never ceases to amaze me just how much crap we have accumulated in our almost five years together.

Speaking of which, February 5th will mark 5 years of marriage for Matt and I! I can't believe how fast the past 5 years have gone. We had talked about getting away for a bit for our anniversary, but it looks like we'll be right in the middle of renovations and moving, so we'll have to post-pone a bit. Que sara, I suppose.

So hopefully the new year will bring much health and happiness to everyone, including us in the Conrad house!

I love this season!

2009-12-17T23:48:00.000-08:00

Hello, my name is Alison... [Hi, Alison] and I am a SUCKER FOR CHRISTMAS.

For real. I love everything about it. The lights, the music, the decorations, the smells, the food... all of it! Ok, well, maybe not being almost backed over by a crabby woman on an electric shopping cart at Target this evening, but I guess that just comes with the shopping territory. I can handle it. The ratio of awesome : not so awesome is in my favor.

I gave in this year and we went with a fake, pre-lit tree. I always said, NEVER!, and scoffed anytime Matt brought it up. But it was time. My sneaky two year old still puts everything in her mouth (umm, seriously- isn't she supposed to be over that?) and I didn't need to have a panic attack about all of the pine needles dropping by week #2. So, we went pre-lit and I have to say... I'm happy with my decision. Its super pretty, really easy and we can put it up much earlier than we could keep a real tree fresh for. I'm all about decorating early... did I mention I'm into the whole Christmas thing?

In the spirit of the season, we took some cute pics of Kate for our Christmas cards... isn't she the most?!

Well, it's late and I'm beat, but I promised myself I'd actually get this thing updated before a full month passed. Phew! Now if I can only make sure to get the Christmas updates up! We'll see how that goes. Baby steps.

Two Years Old!

2009-11-21T16:51:00.000-08:00

How could it be possible? How can two years have already passed?

One of Kate's favorite things is watching movies of herself, so this morning we watched a few short clips on my laptop of when she began walking last year. I could have cried. Okay... I did. A little.

On Wednesday, my baby turned two. Two. Two years. I am that sappy girl who all day thought about the different things that went on that day two years earlier. When we started counting contractions, when we called the family, when she arrived... it doesn't seem like that could have been that long ago. But, here we are, 2009 and two years into my beautiful daughter's life!

We celebrated on the 14th with a little Yo Gabba Gabba party, since that is her favorite. Here are some highlights :)

This is while everyone is signing happy birthday to her... can you tell she digs the attention?

I bought her birthday shirt from GoldenShop on Etsy... she is fabulous! If you're in need of a custom tee, bib or party hat, she is your girl!

It was a fun day and she is loaded up on toys for the year! We need a bigger house! And now Christmas is coming! Where has 2009 gone? As much as I am freaking out about another year being over, I am excited. 2010 is going to be a great one!

Who are you?!

2009-09-24T13:37:00.000-07:00

The past few days, this is the question I have been asking my daughter. Who ARE you and WHAT have you done with my Kathryn?!

It started with the anti-breakfast movement. Waffles? No! Fruit? No! Cereal?! No thank you. Well, at least there was a thank you in there. So the battle raged on.

The other night, after being told (for the 100th time) that the remote isn't a toy, this child threw herself on the ground in a full-blown temper tantrum, complete with kicking legs and screams. I pointed at her, looked at Matt, and asked [all together now...] WHO IS SHE!?!?

The latest assault has been launched at bed time. We go through the same routine. Every night. We do not stray. Every night. Then suddenly, one evening this week, it was as if I'd left her in that room with a savage pack of lions or something. She stood at the end of her crib (we have a video monitor), armed with her blankie and her treasured copy of Guess How Much I Love You, screaming at the top of her lungs. As I recall, it goes something like, "Na-na-NA MOOOOOOMMYYYYY!!!!!" Throw "DADDYYYYY!" in there a few times, too. Holy love.

But hey, I still love her.

Time flies...

2009-08-17T19:13:00.001-07:00

Ok, so I let another month slip by without updating. How did a month already pass? People always told me, "If you think time goes by fast now, just wait until you have kids." So true. It's like I blink and suddenly we're in the middle of a new month already. August 17th? We're even more than halfway through the month... summer is almost over and fall is quickly approaching. My birthday. Kate's birthday. Thanksgiving. Christmas... aahhhh!

Though it's been a busy month, its been a good one. We spent some time with Kate's cousin, Madison, at the beginning of the month. Kate just adores her... and I am looking forward to having a great babysitter in a couple of years ;-) We visited Zoomar's Petting Zoo down in San Juan Capistrano one day- always a good time. My little miss Dr. Doolittle loves any chance to play with animals (or 'ammals' as she calls them). She couldn't get enough of this giant rabbit- which I'm pretty sure could've devoured her if given the chance- and made friends with one particularly greedy guinea pig.

We also spent a little time this summer down at Lake Mission Viejo. It's really great for little ones, since they can play in the sand without risk of big ol' waves knocking them over. She is a water baby for sure; never wants to leave. While getting ready to go down there the other day, I put her swimsuit top on (the rash guard kind) and kept her in a regular diaper and shorts until we got down there. As I got her bag together, she grabbed her swimsuit bottoms and proceeded to put it on as her hat. Hilarity ensued:

I promise- she was in no danger of strangulation. Just wanted to make that clear. No need to call CPS.

Looking around our home, I've finally decided (after almost 3 years) that we need more pictures on the walls. I wanted to put one of Kate in the tub in my bathroom, so one night during bathtime, I snapped a couple of my bubbly little love bug. Both will soon be hanging in my bathroom because... well, because they're too cute not to do something with.

We have a huge blank wall in our living room that I am trying to make some decisions about. I think I had the attitude that we're just renting and that I didn't want to put a lot of work into it if we were going to end up moving anytime soon, but its looking like we'll be staying put for a while, so I am feeling the need to make our space more "homey". I have no clue what to do though... I am craptastic at decorating. Photos? Mirror? Shelves? A little of each? Ugh. Who wants to come design a cool looking wall for me?!

It must be one of those phases, because I am feeling like I want to redo everything in our home. Though I've wanted to redo Kate's room for a while now, we can also add to the list new towels, new linens for our bedroom and new lamps (ok, well... I've wanted those for a while now, considering they're the same crappy Target ones from college). I've got the itch, what can I say.

I've also decided that someone should nominate me for "What Not to Wear". Yeah, I know... it doesn't really work that way. While my wardrobe may not really be all that offensive, it would be stinkin' sweet to get a whole new one courtesy of TLC. I'm just sayin'- Stacy and Clinton can pick out a sleek new look for me anytime.

I think I'm in a rut. Hmph.

Catching Up

2009-07-06T23:08:00.000-07:00

Let's see, let's see... I've been neglecting my blog a bit to keep from neglecting everything else in my life: husband, daughter, job, friends, hobbies... life is full of things that need to be done!

I'll try to recap since my last post. Where to begin?
We celebrated Father's day a day early, since our friend's planned their wedding on the actual day (which turned out to be pretty nice... very sweet moment for the proud father-of-the-bride). We spent Saturday at Matt's parents' house, hanging out and BBQ'ing. For Matt's gift, I set up all of his fly-fishing gear on a backdrop and tried to get a shot of Kate... didn't work. She screamed the whole time. Then, I took her to a lovely park to get some great pics for Matt... unfortunately, they didn't turn out, either. Parks + running toddler = no good.

Finally, I re-attempted the fishing gear on the backdrop and came up with a set of three pretty adorable shots... here is one we ended up with...

I can't think of anything else particularly eventful, so we'll fast forward to July. On the 3rd we celebrated with another pair of friends at their wedding in Malibu. We decided to book a hotel, to avoid a long drive home... glad we did! Kate was such a trooper, and proved how resilient she is by falling face first off of a chair. I know... mom of the year let her fall... way to go.

We spent the 4th up at my mom's place... Matt spent a lot of time these past few months totally redoing the front yard and patio and it is awesome! My mom's place has fantastic, 180 degree views of the ocean, so we spend our time in that front yard. Then, on the 4th of July, a woman in Palos Verdes pays for her own firework show (rumor has it that it is in memory of her son). Conveniently for us, those fireworks position themselves perfectly in front of the front yard. Woohoo! Here are some pics from the day!

I had my first go at trying to photograph fireworks... I learned a thing or two, and hopefully they'll turn out better next time!

All in all, good times for the C fam!

I heart fingerpaint.

2009-06-12T21:41:00.000-07:00

While at the store a few weeks ago, I had the genius idea to buy some finger paints for K, thinking what fun it would be since she loves to color. Realizing what a disaster it could be, I'd hesitated to bust it out. So the other day, I taped some trash bags to the floor, pulled out the big paper and let her have at it. Oh how this girl loves a mess...

Lessons learned:
1) Taping bags to the floor = good plan (because the paper practically disintegrated because of that wet paint).
2) Use clippies in her hair... the paint on her face is due to her desperately trying to sweep her hair out of her eyes.
3) Have the bathtime stuff READY. Oops. Thought I had this nailed- cleared the path to the bathtub, had her in just a diaper... aaaand: forgot a towel. She was covered in paint, I was covered in paint and we didn't have a towel for post-bath needs. Good thing she is small- a hand towel did the job. I just prayed we'd make it back to her room before she peed on the floor. We made it- phew!

Last week we took a trip down to SeaWorld for some fun with family and fish. Matt's parents, aunt, sister and her two girls were in for the fun, too. It was a lot of fun and Kate was awesome (but definitely tired, since napping wasn't even on her agenda). I appreciate that she keeps life simple: every animal was either a fish or a dog (minus the penguins- they're boops [Kate speak for "bird"]). Dolphin? Fish. Whale? Fish. Sealion? Dog. Yep.

Lots of fun! It's been a busy month, and it probably won't calm down much until... well, maybe August?? But probably not. I feel like our calendar is always so full of stuff... church stuff, family stuff, friend stuff- which I guess is a good thing, but I get exhausted even looking at my calendar anymore. Phew! I guess I could just go ahead and get to bed now for some rest (since everyone else in this house has been asleep for at least 3 hours), but I'm sure I could figure something else out that needs to get done!

Piggies!!!

2009-05-29T00:24:00.001-07:00

Okay, okay. So the very moment the ultrasound tech said, "Looks like it's a girl!", I began the dreaming. Dreaming of pink. Dreaming of tea parties. And of course, dreaming of pigtails. Who doesn't love seeing a little girl with two, precious tufts of hair poking out the side of her little head? I know I'm a sucker for them.

But months went by and my beautiful daughter had little hair. Very little. Not really even enough for a little clippie.

Then came yesterday. Oh, yesterday! I was admiring our amazing little creation while she was watching Sesame Street and thought, "Hmm... I bet I can..." So I grabbed the hair bands, a comb and crossed my fingers that she wouldn't fight me...
AND IT WORKED! PIGGIES!!!

Too stinkin' cute. It really is a big milestone ;-) She also had her 18-month well check yesterday. Her stats, you ask?
Weight: 27.5 pounds (80th percentile: chubba-roo!!)
Height: 32.5 inches (75th percentile)
Head: Big. Yeah... 95th percentile. "Lots of brains" is a nice spin the Doc puts on that one.

Doc said she looks great, is ahead with vocabulary and the best thing: we're done with shots until she is 4-years-old! Woohoo! I hate seeing her cry when she gets shots- it is so sad. Glad that is behind us for a while!

The other day, we came home from my mom's house in the South Bay and she fell asleep in the car. She was still beat when we walked in the door, so I laid her down on the couch for a little bit. I couldn't believe how long she looked! My baby, who used to not even stretch from one side of the cushion to the other, is getting so big!

Crazy. I wish time would slow the heck down.

One and a Half!

2009-05-19T23:16:00.000-07:00

While I was pregnant with Kathryn, we received so many generous gifts from people... it was unreal. Among all of the amazing things, we received quite a bit of 18-month sized clothing- for her to "grow into". I thought it would be impossibly long before she could wear those- after all, 18-months seemed like such a long time; so far away.

And here we are. Kate turned 18 months old yesterday. 6 months away from being a 2-year-old. Even her 1st birthday had seemed so far away, and now the 2nd birthday is coming. Fast. It is very strange for me... I have to admit. I'm really not sure how time has slipped by so quickly.

We spent yesterday afternoon playing in her $5.99 kiddie pool in the backyard. It was hot and sunny- perfect day for a dip. It makes me laugh that the smell of water from the hose takes me back to when I was little, playing in the front yard and drinking from the hose (which we ALL did when we were kids, but as it turns out, modern science and medicine say is a poor choice; how did my generation and those before me ever live...).

She loves the water- definitely a little fish. Guess we'll need to sign up for some swimming lessons for the summer!

This last one kills me... she is a classy girl.

I sometimes catch myself staring and smiling at her like a total goober. She really just amazes me! She is so curious and wants to explore everything. She talks so much now- and it's often hilarious. The other day, when she woke up from her nap, I walked in to her room and she immediately popped up and said, "I pooped!" Sure enough. Nice. She is a dancing machine, too. She is so fun... I think I still have to pinch myself every now and again to make sure this is all for real!

Happy one-and-a-half, baby!

Mother's Day

2009-05-09T20:38:00.000-07:00

Since Sunday is technically a work day for me, we have little time to celebrate Sunday holidays- namely, Mother's Day and Father's Day.

Much to my surprise this morning, I was awakened by my littlest love standing by my bedside in her sweetest set of pajamas saying, "Moooooommy! Moooooomy!" I opened my eyes to see Matt carrying in a delicious breakfast in bed, complete with coffee, juice, french toast sticks, eggs and bacon; with a vase of red roses to go with it! It doesn't get much better than that! I ate up, snuggled with my loves for a while, then got up for the day.

After I got out of the shower, I could hear Matt milling around in the kitchen. When I came out to investigate, he was packing up our picnic set for a lunch on the beach. We grabbed the blanket, food, beach umbrella and the kiddo and headed down to Laguna Beach, right below the Montage Resort (fabulous, not crowded, beautiful landscaping on the walk-way above the beach). What a great day!

Zoo Day

2009-05-02T19:55:00.000-07:00

Today we made a trip over to the Orange County Zoo. Matt and I had gone once before- before Kathryn was a part of our lives. It is a perfect zoo for a younger toddler- it's small, free admission for under 2 and only $2 for adults. There's a petting zoo-ish type area, which was where Kate clearly had the most fun.

I didn't really notice it while we were there, but now looking at the pictures, I have to laugh at her "bodyguard" of a father. Please observe.

All seems well here. Daddy and daughter are smiling and happy.

Still visiting the sheep. Daddy's hand making sure fingers aren't jabbed within biting distance. Note, daughter's other arm is also restrained.

Carefully approaching tiny goat in petting area. Note daddy's eye contact with mom, warning her to speed up picture taking process before tiny goat turns on daughter. For future reference, I believe we may see this look again when I am taking photos of Kate and her prom date...

Ahh... daughter is finally allowed to walk around on her own. Kind of. Note "hand-of-safety" attached to back of dress.

This is so typical Matt... but I love it. He cares so tenderly for Kate and it is apparent in every way. We had a fun day walking around the little zoo, checking out animals and hearing Kate refer to every animal as a dog (coyotes, peccaries), a kitty (bobcat, raccoons, fox) or a bird (well... yeah, she got those right).

Life is Busy.

2009-04-23T13:02:00.000-07:00

March and April are crazy months for us. Between all the family birthdays, Lent and Easter (when you work at a church, its ridiculous), I feel like there is little time to do so much as breathe! So... yeah, a month has passed since I last updated here. Nothing out of the ordinary has happened, really.

Kate had her first gig as a flower girl at Carly & Chris' wedding on April 3rd. They got married up in Lodi at this fantastic winery called Wine & Roses. Everything was beautiful and Kate was a super star! She does love the spotlight :)

So far, I have to say that this is my favorite age. I know- I've said it probably every month since Kate has been born, but seriously. She's this little walking, talking, curious ball of fun now days. She's discovering so much and is such a little sponge. My current favorite things about my [baby] little girl:
* Dragging her blankie around, laying in the middle of the floor and saying "Niiiigh-niiiiigh".
* Giving big ol' kisses over and over again, complete with "MUAH!" sound.
* Dropping her blankie & lovies out of the crib and exclaiming, "Ohhh NO!" as they hit the floor.
* Touching her nose and saying, "Beep".
* Uncontrollable giggles when we chase after her (extra giggles if we crawl on our hands and knees).
* Her undying passion to use a spoon all by herself (always followed by bathtime).

Yeah. I could go on forever. She's fantastic.

Genetics

2009-03-15T21:10:00.000-07:00

There is a tradition that runs in my family. It was passed down to me from my mother, to her from her mother... maybe even to my grandmother from her mother. It is well known among family to be something the women in our family have in common. Perhaps genetic.

What is it, you ask? Ok... I'll tell you. Come closer:
We're terrible housekeepers.

It's true. I've always wanted to be Suzy Homemaker, but I am afraid it may not be in the cards. There are times when I look around and think, My word. If some old friend showed up at my door right now, I'd have to poke my head out through the door and give them directions to meet me at the nearest Starbucks in order to avoid complete embarrassment. That's pretty bad.

I went on a cleaning kick the other night (which happens oh-so-rarely). The strange thing is, I feel SO good when my house is spic-and-span. Really good. Like a burden has been lifted off my shoulders. Like I can breathe a little easier. So it should be easy to keep things clean right? Hmm. Funny how that never works out.

I've informed Matt that once we're homeowners, I intend to hire a cleaning service. Once I have that pride of ownership, instead of that crappy "eh, it's a rental" attitude, I hope I'll feel a bit more motivated. I hope. But just in case, I plan to hire the professionals.

In the meantime, if you intend to drop by... could you give me 24 hours notice? I'll have some tidying up to do.

Where's your....?

2009-03-11T23:26:00.000-07:00

I've started my own little project- a 365 project. One photo every day for 365 days! It will be tough to actually commit to taking and posting a photo every day, but I like the challenge! www.onephotofor365.blogspot.com

Today Kate and I went out in the yard to play and take some pictures. To keep her attention, we played the "Where is your _______?" game!

Where is your mouth?

Check out the CHOMPERS! These "first year" molars are intense! They must h.u.r.t because she has been extraordinarily whiny! They look huge- I can only imagine how much they must ache :(

Where are your eyes?

Where are your feet?

She is so cute- it really is unreal. She is just so much fun.

All I have ever wanted was to be a mommy. When I was little, I wanted to be a mommy. In high school, I knew one day I wanted kids. When I met Matt, his desire to have kids in the future was a big plus. When I got pregnant so quickly, my dreams were coming true. Now I have this perfect little bundle of love... and I am so blessed. But sometimes I find myself wondering: how could I ever love another child as much as I love Kate?

I know I will (presuming that we're blessed with another baby one day). But it was difficult to imagine loving Kate as much as I do before she was born. Now that she is in our lives, I wonder... could I love another little person as much as I love her? How can someone have that much love? The love I feel for her is sometimes overwhelming. The natural love and protection I have for her is sometimes even frightening- like I would do ANYTHING to protect my daughter. As an only child, I never felt any competition for love. I am excited for the future- for God to teach me how much a human being is capable of loving. I think that I am sadly unaware of how much capability to love we are actually given as humans. It really is boundless, I am sure.

I'm off to bed... before I crawl under the covers tonight, I'll no doubt turn on my video monitor, take a look at my sleeping sweet pea and thank God for that girl. That girl! She is a blessing beyond words. And Matt will, no doubt, get a kiss too. :)

The "Eyes" Have It

2009-02-28T22:08:00.000-08:00

EYE! It's Kate's new favorite word. At any given time during the day, she can be found jabbing her finger into my eye, Matt's eye, or her own and excitedly exclaiming, "EYEEEE!!" It is usually followed by "Nooonse!" (nose) or "Ayyyre!" (hair- which she pulls out of my head, thankyouverymuch).

She cracks me up. Today while watching Yo Gabba Gabba, she was trying to imitate Elijah Wood's "dancy-dance" by picking her foot up and then swinging her arms around like a crazy person. I swear, I try to get these things on video... but the second I bust out the camera she just stops and stays perfectly still. Little bugger.

A few weeks ago, Kate and I had a lovely lunch with my friend Summer at Corner Bakery in Irvine. When we left, I, being a total airhead, left Kate's high chair/shopping cart cover on the high chair. I didn't even realize until a few days later... by the time I called CB, it was long gone. However, Etsy always makes me happy again. I found a fabulous seller, MichaelMoooDesign: http://www.etsy.com/shop.php?user_id=5862007 I sent her my own fabric and she put it together SO fast! She is phenomenal- if you need a cart cover, she is the one to go to :) Here are a couple of shots from our trip to the grocery store today:

I don't know where the heck those blue eyes came from, but all I can say is God Bless recessive genes!

Since pictures are always fun, here are a few from how we spent our valentines day. The two loves of my life and I headed up to the park to play, since the weather was perfect- crisp, but sunny: my favorite kind of day! I am so blessed... it is ridiculous.

Her new trick is "jumping". She tries to jump up and down... which basically amounts to bending her knees, then standing up tall. It's so cute- but again, she turns into stone when I get out the video camera. Ugh.

I had to have Matt take a picture of me today for church's new website. Ugh. I'm just the youth director- can't we skip my picture? I looked at the picture and realized just how fat I have let myself get in the past year. I was looking good before I got pregnant, since Matt and I had been walking the 4.5 miles from home, around MV lake and back. It's just gotten progressively worse after being pregnant. I need to get my butt in gear, because seriously- yuck! Oh well- maybe this will serve as some inspiration. If I got in front of the camera more instead of being behind it so much, maybe I'd think a little harder before settling into the couch instead of going for a run ;-)

Off to change the laundry and get everything ready for tomorrow morning... its tough to get ready for church anymore without proper planning the night before!

My Little Caged Bird

2009-02-11T10:44:00.000-08:00

Now that Kate is a mover and a shaker, being locked up in my office for 4-5 hours a day is an absolute tragedy for her. She stands at the chair that blocks my office door (yes, chair... she can pick up and move the gate I bought) and whines and throws her toys out, trying to coax any of the ladies that work in the office to let her out. Inevitably, someone always comes to her rescue.

I try not to feel bad- we have definitely developed a schedule now (and hey, she naps better at the office than she does at home, now) and there are so many people here who love her. I am sure that being around so many people so often has contributed to her socialness- she is definitely a people person. I do feel kind of bad, though. She just wants to fly and I have to keep her caged. It's just part of being a parent, though, as I need to keep her safe.

I am so amazed by this kid- she's just so stinkin' smart! Her vocabulary is growing every day. She has mastered Daddy, Momma/Mommy, doggie, nana (banana), night-night and moon; she definitely gets her point across in other ways too. She knows her nose, eyes, ears, hands, toes and belly. She grabs her socks or shoes and tries to put them on. Maybe these aren't unusual for kiddos of this age, but in general, it really is an amazing feat... kids this age just learn SO much SO fast. Impressive!

At almost 15 months, Kate's new favorite things are spinning around in circles, bubbles and eating kiwi. A day with any combination of those three things is a good day!

Perspective.

2009-01-16T23:05:00.000-08:00

I need to stop being such a whiner. I complain too much. About dumb things. Trivial things. Things that some people should be so lucky to complain about (cell phones, slow internet, car trouble...).

Then something happens and throws everything into perspective. In hearing of a friend's great loss, I woke up (if you pray, please pray for E- for her comfort, healing and health). Life is short; it is precious; it is unpredictable. And the less time I spend whining, the more time I'll have to notice everything precious and joyous about life. There. I said it.

This evening I looked at Kate and had one of those, "I can't believe she's really mine" moments. This perfect, silly, sweet, blue-eyed little girl. Ours? Really?! It's still amazing... 14 months later and I'm still baffled by this little miracle.

I bought her a tutu off of Etsy recently, and just today had some time to take some photos. She is not a fan... and I almost cried from laughing so hard at how silly it all really is.

After I changed her out of the pink-fluffy-ridiculousness, she was considerably happier and gave me that killer smile... with her head against the floor. Why? I dunno. But I love it.

On another joyous note, 2009 is going to be the year of weddings for many of my friends! Hooray (and it's about freaking time, kids)! Now if only they'd make some honeymoon babies... kidding, friends! But in all seriousness, I am so excited for all of them and am really looking forward to this special year. I did get to practice my photography skills and take some engagement pics for Scott (my friend since 10th grade) and Emily (his beautiful fiancee- seriously, Scott, you're marrying up)!

It was so fun and a huge honor- thanks guys!

Off to bed... and to say some prayers. I'll say one for you, too. ;-)

Happy New Year!

2009-01-01T23:43:00.000-08:00

What a year! I can't believe how quickly it came and went. It really is amazing, looking back on these past 12 months, how much really happens. I feel like it becomes so much more apparent when you have a little one. The changes in a baby are so remarkable that their first year seems like the biggest year you've ever experienced... does that make sense? I think what I am trying to say is that so many things happen within a year that we lose sight of after a while; but, with a baby you remember details of the last 12 months so much more vividly. In the January of 2008, it was the most exciting thing to hear my daughter laugh for the first time. By December of 2008, she is now walking. Two very different milestones; both so amazing for a mother... and those are only two of the many incredible things she has accomplished.

Christmas was fun as always, but so strange, as my grandpa was still in the hospital. It was the first time in 26 years I've had Christmas dinner without my grandpa and that was a hard thing for me to let go of. Though we visited with him at the hospital in the morning and did some gift opening, it isn't the same to sit around the table with family and not have him there. He is home now, though, and was able to watch football all day on his big ol' TV... so he is happy.

We did take Kate to see Santa for the first time. As you can see, she didn't get the memo that Santa is one of the good guys.

New Year's Eve was supposed to be quiet for us- just sitting on our couch watching the ball drop then heading to bed... but Kate woke up at 11:30 crying and upset. That lasted until about 2am when she finally gave up. As I mentioned, she has started walking this week, so perhaps she is sore (kind of like when we do a new activity that our muscles aren't used to, you know?) and the fussiness will pass. Here are her last photos of 2008!

She was a beastly character today with the whining and back arching... but it is oh-so-precious watching her learn to walk, that it makes up for it ;-) Here is the link to her first ever YouTube performance- the night she decided she was ready to tackle this walking thing!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N_N-qj629iQ

2008 brought a new hobby for me... photography! I've always liked taking pictures and I've always loved the idea of photography- I just never did much about learning how to really do it. So with the inspiration of our daughter, the purchase of my dslr in February and a helpful class in August (not to mention TONS of reading around the internet and photography books), I've discovered a new love. A month ago, I didn't think I'd ever want to pursue a business... but in the last couple of weeks my curiosity has peaked. Who knows what 2009 might do to my hobby! But as of now... I just love being a mommy with a camera.

So that's that. I'm starting the New Year with the same old bad habits- staying up too late farting around on the internet. With that, I'm off to bed! Welcome 2009!

Updates!

2008-12-18T23:26:00.000-08:00

Woo... what a busy month has passed. And it only continues...

So Kate is 13 months old today! In the month since I've updated I feel like so much has happened, but my brain can't recall much of it! Kate's party was a good time... there are far too many pictures to upload, but here are some highlights:

We spent Thanksgiving at Matt's parents' house, and my mom and grandpa joined in the festivities. It was fairly mellow and thankfully we were close to home. It was loads easier this year with Kate being a year old- rather than 4 days old! No breastfeeding every 2 hours, no yucky "I just had a baby" tummy to hide (ok, well it isn't gorgeous still, but its an improvement)... much more enjoyable!

Two days later we hopped a plane to Maui! Yay! Kate was awesome on her first plane ride! Slept very little, but didn't make too much noise. We did upgrade to first class which was AMAZING with a little one... made it so much easier (and it was a cheap upgrade- holla!). The trip was a blast. We didn't do too much- just hung out by the pool and the beach and enjoyed the family. It was a Conrad family extravaganza: Matt's mom & dad, aunt, brother, sister & bro-in-law with the two girls, and us. Lots of fun.

Kate is a TOTAL water baby! She couldn't get enough of the pool or the beach. She'd cry when it was time to get out of the water! She also ate a TON of sand... I definitely need to plan better the next time we hit the beach!

The flight home was a red-eye and she slept from take-off to landing... amazing! I couldn't believe it, but she did. Now, me... I didn't sleep a wink... but at least it was quiet.

Matt's sister and the girls are here visiting now, which is so fun. It's nice to spend time with them, and Kate just adores being around them. The girls are 3 and 16 months, and they do play so sweetly together :)

Last weekend I got a call I didn't need... my grandpa fell. Again. And broke his neck. Again. So now he is in the hospital and was fitted into a halo. Again. Unbelievable. Our praise report is that he isn't paralyzed (when by all accounts, says the doctor, he really should be). We're really praying he can be home for Christmas in a week, but time will tell. Any good thoughts, prayers and/or positive ju-ju are welcomed and appreciated!

Highlight of my day today (aside from Kate's killer giggle, because that is my highlight every day): I bought some wicked red heels this afternoon. We have a Christmas party to go to on Monday and I wanted something to liven up my little black dress. I love them- and of course I got the little red clutch to match. I heart shopping.

Happy Birthday Sweet Girl!

2008-11-18T18:47:00.000-08:00

One year. I can't believe it. How did this year go so fast? In some ways, it feels like our daughter has always been a part of our lives... like, I don't really remember what we did without her. On the other hand, it feels like we just left the hospital with our new little bundle, all wrapped in pink.

At this time last year, we had just met our little Kathryn Elizabeth... seen her for the first time, heard her cry and already fallen madly in love. Within moments. I remember counting all her tiny fingers and toes. She was very pink and had the most perfect nose... and she still does.

It is amazing how much babies change in only one year. What one year ago was a helpless, flailing, delicate newborn is now a giggling, stubborn, moving, shaking ball of personality! I can't even begin to imagine what this next year will look like! At 12 months, Kathryn is cruising (not walking yet, though), says "baba" very excitedly any time she sees her bottle, laughs at anything, shakes her head "no" anytime she starts doing something she knows she isn't supposed to... she's too wonderful!

If you know much about me, I cry. Often. At most anything. So tonight, while I was rocking her, right around the time she made her appearance into the world one year ago, I finally got emotional. My baby girl has almost (not quite) tripled her weight since birth, gained a good 10 inches, has 6 teeth (and is working on 2 more) and begun the transition from 'baby' to 'little girl'. Crazy!

This morning, she had birthday pancakes for breakfast then battled her morning nap until it became a futile task- so she won. Mommy lost. Then we went off to work as usual. Had a birthday lunch with the office staff, had a birthday cupcake- with some fun orange frosting (what a mess!), then came home.

She's been crabby and whiny most of the day... and only napped for 30 minutes total. She'll sleep good tonight, though. Tomorrow morning is her one-year check, complete with a few shots. Poor kid. And then Saturday is the big day- the 1st birthday party!

So I'm exhausted and emotional, but so SO grateful for the blessings in my life. I'm certainly undeserving of all these blessings, but I guess that is the beauty of grace. This second year will be an adventure and I am so excited for all the amazing things we'll get to experience together as a family!

My cup runneth over!

The Due Date

2008-11-11T10:44:00.000-08:00

It was a year ago today that I sat on our couch pouting. Kathryn was due 11/11 and my uterus hadn't made any moves yet. Over it. People that were due with their babies after me had already had their babies. I was getting grumpy.

It's funny looking back... she was worth every single minute more that she stayed "in the oven", but I was so crabby and tired of being pregnant. Seven days later- bam, baby! And a year later, I miss being pregnant. Funny how that goes.

We had a fun scare on Monday morning at 3:00am. I woke up to the sound of the smoke alarm in Kate's room screaming at us! I don't think I have ever moved so quickly in my life- out of bed, down the hall and into her room. She hadn't even woken up at that point- which REALLY scared me at first... then she started to stir. I took her out of the room and Matt came in to check out the alarm. It was no biggie- our heater had come on for the first time in many months and the dust that collected was burning off, which triggered the smoke detector. After that adrenaline rush, it wasn't easy getting back to sleep.

Now she is working on two new teeth and has been quite the crab. On that note, time to go deal with Crabby McGee!

Cute as a bug!

2008-11-01T22:33:00.000-07:00

Last night was a first for Kate: her first Halloween! We took some time pre-Halloween night to get some good shots in her costume, and then had a playdate with her friend Sienna, who was also sporting the ladybug look, coincidentally.

That first picture cracks me up... poor Kathryn doesn't get to spend a ton of time with other babies, so when she does get some social time, she is all over it- literally. She kept trying to pull to standing using Sienna's dress, crawling all over her, putting her finger in Sienna's mouth (and yes- she did get bit), and trying to give her little friend kisses (which amounts to licking her). Babies are so funny.

So we're halfway into month 11 and I'm planning Kate's 1st birthday party. Unreal. Matt and I spent some time in the backyard last week trying to get one good picture to use for her invitations... out of 81 pictures, here are some faves (the first one is the one we used for the invite, by the by):

It is amazing how much she has changed, even just within this last month/ month-and-a-half. She's a cruising machine- zipping around the furniture like it's no big deal; she proudly declares "Baba!" when she catches even the slightest glimpse of her bottle (which, much to my dismay, I am planning our escape from once that first birthday hits); if you ask for a kiss, she'll plant one on your cheek (open mouth I'm afraid... I swear I'm trying to teach her to be a lady...) and then the sweetest part- she says, "isssss!". Now, to anyone else this probably means nothing, but I SWEAR she is saying Kiss! She does it all the time- there is no way it's just a coincidence. Is there? No- there's no way.

Her personality is really starting to shine- she's always been a sweet and mellow baby, but now she is just so personable. She babbles away with full inflection in her voice and has fun little conversations with her toys. She shakes her head "No" when she starts to head for a "No-no zone" in the house. She slays me- she is hilarious!

Tomorrow morning should be an interesting experiment... our first "Fall Back" with a baby. So on a morning that used to bring a delicious extra hour of sleep, we'll see what Miss K does. On that note, I am off to reset the clocks, put my laundry in the dryer and maybe read a little before I call it a night.

Ugh.

2008-10-18T10:19:00.000-07:00

Dear Next Door Neighbor's Dog,

Thanks for that fun barking fit. I love when Kate gets a 20-minute morning nap. It puts her in a great mood.

One request: can you SHUT UP for her afternoon nap?
Thanks.

I'm not bitter. Not at all.
Off to get Crabby McGee.

New lens!

2008-10-16T10:57:00.001-07:00

October-13
Originally uploaded by A-Rad

As a birthday gift from my mom and grandpa, I got a sweet new lens for my camera! Woohoo! My mom says it is like giving herself a gift, since she gets the outcome from it.

Matt and I took Kate out to the backyard with our new, big ol' pumpkin to try out this new lens... fun! It was an overcast day, which was actually kind of nice- so many pictures of her end up with "hot spots" from the sun (bright spots on her face). Cloud cover is much appreciated.

I just love this expression- she is such a happy girl!

Pumpkin Patch!

2008-10-10T19:21:00.000-07:00

Big changes occur in one year...
OCTOBER 2007:

OCTOBER 2008:

I much prefer the latter image- don't you? =)

We took Kate to her first pumpkin patch today! It was a lot of fun- animals to look at, pumpkins to play with and lots of photo ops. I'm sure it will be a lot more fun for her once she is a bit bigger, but Matt and I had a good time at least. Without further ado, some photo highlights from our day.

New business!

2008-09-27T22:26:00.001-07:00

So I finally figured out how to add crap from our Etsy site to my blog... now you can see my shameless promotion of my mom's and my business! I think maybe I'll skim Etsy for some other stuff I love another time and share a few of things I have found from other sellers there that I adore :) I could spend a lot of money on Etsy. A lot. So much fun, unique stuff!

Now, about Kate- since she is the whole reason this blog ever started. Much to my chagrin (and yes, I loooove the word "chagrin"), Kate is growing up so much each day. Don't get me wrong, I love to see her learn and grow... but it is crazy! My once immobile little pile of baby has turned into a cruising machine. She is no longer satisfied playing with her toys on the floor. Oh no. She is pulling up on EVERYTHING (including unsafe, unanchored things- gosh, Alison... get the babyproofing finished for craps sake...) and walking holding on to furniture like it ain't no thang. Life was so much easier when she couldn't go anywhere. But damned if it ain't sweeter now that she gets that "I'm so proud of myself" look on her face when she is standing up.

She particularly enjoys standing against the mirror and giving her reflection sweet baby kisses. Dang... we made one cute little girl.

Ooh! And! Exciting news! Kate is finally crawling like a real baby! Though she still reverts to the trusty army crawl once in a while, she is finally a crawling machine (mostly because that is the easiest way to pull herself to standing).

I'm in the midst of the 1st birthday party planning. We were just watching Ace of Cakes on the Food Network, and someone had a Charm City Cake made for their daughters' 1st birthday (twin girls). I love my girl with everything I've got, but I'm not going to spend everything I've got on a freaking cake. She'll have to settle for my homemade Duncan Hines variety. If she remembers in her adulthood and struggles with it, then I guess we'll pay for her therapy. Eh.

Busy day tomorrow- church, teaching Sunday School (look out high schoolers because it is going to be fun), then off to T-town to pay a visit to the proudest grandma and great-grandpa this side of Heaven. And the freaking jumpiest weiner dog... but I digress...

Due to this aforementioned busyness, I am sending myself off to bed.

Double Digits.

2008-09-20T22:55:00.001-07:00

10 months old- what gives? That is only two months away from 1-year old and that, my friends, is impossible. There is no way my sweet baby girl could possibly be approaching one year old. No way! The 10 month monkey picture was a failure... I couldn't get my camera to work with me, and I definitely couldn't keep my squirmy wormy daughter to sit still. The result? A horribly blurry picture- but check out that heart melting "I think I'm so funny" smile behind that blur :) Truth is, I'm probably going to cheat and try to take a better one tomorrow. What?

I'll be honest... with all the new babies I see around, I get to thinking. Thinking how neat it was to be pregnant, thinking how unbelievably wonderful it is to get the first glimpse of your baby on the ultrasound, thinking how amazing it is to hold your new baby for the first time and the love you feel all at once. Sometimes I have to remind myself not to blurt out, "Matt- I'm ready for another one!" because there is a slight chance he might say, "Yeah!"

I have to remind myself that Kate isn't even one yet. That I love a glass of wine here and there. That I can sleep for 8 hours at night if I so choose. That my body just became my own again a few short months ago. That the night sweats and emotions after having a new baby could ONLY be amplified by another little one running around.

Yes. I think we will wait. Phew.

9 Months In, 9 Months Out...

2008-08-22T22:50:00.000-07:00

I wonder why the nine months of pregnancy felt so much different than the nine months of motherhood... aside from the obvious. While I really did enjoy my pregnancy, in hindsight it feels like I was pregnant for a long, long time when I compare it to the nine months we've had with Kate. The nine months since she has joined us has flown by.

In Babies R Us today, I was buying Kate's new carseat (since she has grown out of the infant seat) and a mom was commenting on how cute Kate was... she asked how old, and I told her nine months. She went on to tell me about her 3-month old and that her mom tells her that they should not always hold the baby so much so she won't get spoiled, blah-blah-blah. It made me kind of sad... I wanted to yell, "hold her"! Hold her for as long as you can! Because soon she'll be squiggling and squirming and trying to explore the world around her and cuddles will be fewer. Just sayin'.

As I finished my purchase and wished her a good day, she noticed the carseat in out cart. "Oh, she gets a big girl carseat now!" Yep... that made me kinda sad too.

Taking the nine month monkey pic was an adventure. Most of them turned out like this:

We did manage to at least get this one, to show the comparison:

I've become slightly obsessed with remembering the little things... we're all so focused on 'milestones', that I think sometimes the little things get lost. I took Kate to the park last week for her first time on the swing- she loved it! She giggled every time I pushed her, then she'd come back, I'd tickle her feet and she'd squeal with laughter. It was too precious.

Another 'little thing' was last Sunday. She woke up earlier than usual and seemed just as happy as could be. She had her bottle, we played for a while, watched some Baby Einstein "First Signs" for a while... then time came for her oatmeal and fruit. She started yawning in her highchair before I ever had her food ready, and was visibly getting tired. A fun Kate fact: her comfort habit is pulling her hair. Not hard... just kind of like you might twirl your hair through your fingers. So I step over to the counter to grab her cup, turn back around, and sticky-oatmeal-applesauce fingers are running through her sweet, just bathed the night before hair. I almost wanted to be frustrated, because she'd need to have a bath before church now, but I had to laugh. Look at this face...

Makes it look like she has an abundance of hair, hehe. Using a little product always adds volume, right? So, we took a quick bath and she took a fantastic nap before church.

After church, we headed up to Torrance to visit my mom and grandpa. Kate is the light of their lives these days. She has so many people who love her.

I think she has made my grandpa so much more positive in his attitude recently. In May, he broke his neck and has been fitted in a halo for over 3 months now... I don't think I'd be very positive, but he is hanging in there like a trooper and I just know Kate has so much to do with that. Poor guy... he looks like he's been through the ringer, but he is being so upbeat about it. Plus, he can tell all the ladies he was in a motorcycle accident, or something cool like that ;-) That will make up for the fact he hasn't had a haircut in months!

Yep. I love my family.

I miss Matt!

2008-08-06T20:48:00.000-07:00

I've realized this week that I often take my fantastic husband for granted. He has been gone since Friday on a fishing trip with his brothers and it has been just Kate and I. As much as I have really enjoyed the time for the two of us, I miss seeing them together. There is just something about watching my husband and our daughter interact that makes everything alright in the world. Yeah... cheeseball, I know. Mushy, indeed. But what can you do- I'm a sap. Lucky for me, he'll be home tomorrow.

In an attempt to not be a fatty-fatty-fat-fat any longer, I've been working with a trainer in hopes of becoming a toned, shapely, hot young mom. This last time I worked out with her, I got my butt kicked. My quads hurt SO bad afterward, that getting down on the floor to play with Kate had to be a hilarious site. I've seriously been having to hold onto furniture to lower myself onto chairs... it is out of control. But the burn is good, right? Hopefully it means something is working.

Well, before I curl up with my trashy magazine and celebrities and fashion, here are a couple more pictures... because what blog post is complete with out some Kate pics?

Mamarazzi class!

2008-08-04T23:36:00.000-07:00

This past weekend I had the opportunity to learn how the heck to use my DSLR *out* of auto mode! I actually wasn't using auto too much- mostly Av (aperture priority). Occasionally I'd try manual mode, but it never yielded very good results. Now, I feel so much more confident with my camera and I learned that editing is AMAZING! Adobe Lightroom is a phenominal program... I think I'm in love. I didn't realize when I bought my camera that this would become such a fun little hobby.

Poor Kate... she is destined to be at the end of my camera for the rest of her life!

Here are some of my favorites from the class! The little guy we shot on Saturday was so sweet and SUCH a trooper... look at his sweet little eyes! Adorable!

And of course, I had to try out my new found skills on Kate...

I am thinking I should probably start up a blog strictly for photos, since this could get a bit ridiculous. If I do, you'll hear about it!

Finally Updating...

2008-07-22T22:20:00.000-07:00

Right... so, it has only been about a month since I updated this bad boy. Eh well... full-time job, child and husband take up some time, strangely enough.

On to the important stuff: Kate has two teeth, is army-crawling all over the place and is my sweet little 8-month old super baby! Here's the monthly monkey picture and the best attempt at getting a picture of her little chompers!

Kate had her first 4th of July experience and, in typical Kate Conrad fashion, wasn't going to miss one second of the excitement. We went to my mom & grandpa's house to watch the fireworks, Matt's parents and Eloise also joined us, and Kate wasn't about to go to sleep before she saw some stuff blow up in the sky. Can't blame her- it's exciting business when you're a little squirt like her.

As it turns out, Kate and Matt were able to survive the 5 days without me while I took 8 of the CLC kids and 4 FPCO kids up to the Sacramento Delta for our annual houseboat trip. It was fantastic to not be pregnant this year so I could wakeboard and the like. It was not fantastic; however, to miss my daughter with every thread of my being. Leaving her was the worst- I was a wreck. But we all survived and now we're reunited (and it feels so good). I do believe she will be a daddy's girl... I mean look at them- she's his mini-female-me:

The matching dimple is almost too cute to bear! This, of course, was before Matt made a sudden decision to Bic his head last night... we're full of surprises in the Conrad household, you know.

Suddenly she has learned to army crawl and it is so fun! I know she'll be up crawling around soon... it will come soon- too soon! What happened to my tiny little schmoopsy!?

She's also very into her walker. Ok, now darn it, I am a good mom... and yes, I let her play in a walker sometimes. She's no where near any stairs, I watch her closely to make sure she isn't getting into things, and I leave her in it for very short periods of time... so to all you baby walker critics, if you have a problem with that, then... well... deal with it, I guess. She finally figured out how to go forward- it was all backward for a while, which was pretty funny. This was before she had it mastered, but still undeniably cute...

Well, it is approaching 11pm and I won't make it much longer... I'll try to be more diligent on updating here. Maybe. We'll see.

Still no tooth in sight.

2008-06-27T09:16:00.000-07:00

So for all that I was sure we'd be seeing some teeth by now, the smile remains toothless. She is sleeping ok now, but still chews everything in sight. I swear she's been "teething" for months now. The gums feel ready- just no chompers yet.

She is getting so fun- so much personality. I love hearing her talk, "Ba-ba-ba-ba-baaa," and "La-lala," and "da-da-da-da-daaaaa". Yeah. Lots of 'dada'... not so much 'mama'. But it isn't like she even knows what either of those things mean. It is fun to hear it, nonetheless.

Kate's first time on the grass was interesting... can't say she was a huge fan:

We hit the 7th month and are rapidly approaching 8 months. I can't believe how fast this first year is going. There was a little 12 day old baby girl at church last week, and she was sooo tiny. I said I didn't think Kate was ever that small. As it turns out- this baby was bigger than Kate when she was born! She was close to 9 pounds- Kate wasn't even 8 pounds! How quickly I've forgotten what an itty bitty little thing she was. Look at the comparison!

In a little over a week I'll be leaving my girl for almost a week to take my youth group on houseboats :( While I am excited about the trip, the thought of leaving my sweet girl for a week is tearing me up. I know Matt is the best daddy ever and will take great care of her- I will just miss her. Will she forget me? Will she get her first tooth or start crawling while I'm gone, and I will miss those things? Ahhh! Yeah. I'm a wreck.

We took her down to Crystal Cove last weekend for her first beach experience: it was beautiful down there! The last time we'd gone down there was the day I went into labor :) It was super sunny and the waves were huge! There were dolphins playing in the surf... it was a perfect Southern California day. Not sure Kate was a big fan... I dipped her feet in the water, and she wasn't terribly pleased. The water was a little cold and the waves were very loud... it might have been a bit overwhelming for a little squirt.

Well, we're getting ready to start our day... many more stories to come!

Teething is NO FUN.

2008-06-09T22:59:00.000-07:00

I almost wish I could remember how it felt to start growing your first teeth so that I could sympathize a little better with my poor little lady. The two swollen bumps on her lower gums and her fussiness are sure signs that we'll soon see the appearance of Kate's first teeth! While it is an exciting step, it is rough. She has been Fussy McFusserson the past few nights and hasn't slept her usual 10-12 hours in a while. Oh well- if she needs the comfort in the night, then comfort she shall have.

I am not usually a huge fan of hot weather, but it is fun to be able to let Kate hang out in nothing but a diaper... those baby rolls of chubbiness are too cute not to enjoy now that it is nice and warm!

At her 6 month check up last week (even though she was 6 1/2 months) she was weighing in at 18.7 lbs. and was 26 inches long... big girl! We build them sturdy in the Conrad family. She is a lover of food- totally happy with her oatmeal, veggies and fruit. In fact, she seems to be more fired up about veggies than she is about fruit. Weird!

Here are some pictures from hanging out in her activity center (clothing optional- diaper required):

My mom and I have started our own little business: Kiss Me, Katie Handpainted Wall Letters. Right now we are just using an Etsy shop, but we're hoping to take it beyond that. We paint wall letters for children's rooms. So if you need a baby gift- we're your girls! Etsy is super cool- there is so much fun stuff on there, and it is all handmade. I could do some serious shopping on there! Cute shoes, purses, clothes, art... everything you could want!

Kate is continually fabulous- she can sit on her own like a champ now, and I can tell we aren't far from her crawling days... it won't be long now. She is such a happy, smiley little girl (aside from the teething fun). I am more and more in love with her everyday. Sometimes, when I am tired and frustrated, I don't feel worthy to be a mommy to such an amazing little miracle. She is just too perfect for words!

Well, we're well on our way to the 7-month mark... where has the time gone???

Happy Half Birthday!

2008-05-20T09:39:00.000-07:00

On Sunday Kate hit the 6 month mark! We're half way to her first birthday and I can't believe how quickly time is passing. She has changed so much! Between 5 months and 6 months and good crop of hair has appeared on her head and I swear there is a little more there every day! So cute and fluffy!

Here is the 6 month monkey pic:

A couple of weekends ago, we made a trip out to the desert for one night. She did great and went in the pool for the first time... its hard to say whether she liked it or not. She didn't seem to *not* like it, but wasn't too sure about it (but this picture makes it look like she was unhappy- she really wasn't).

It only took 6 months, but I think I am finally getting into the swing of motherhood. It all works out now (most of the time) and I am learning to relax and enjoy Kate more, rather than worrying all the time. She gets more and more fun all the time- I just want to sit on the floor and play with her and teach her all day!

Eating is fun now... she really digs oatmeal and now we're starting to add veggies and fruits. Right now we're on carrots- makes for some wacky colored diapers, that is for sure! The faces she makes when trying something new are classic! I would post pictures, but we've been slow on picture taking since my Rebel XT is out of commission right now (huge bummer...).

Soon she will be moving all over the place (she already propels herself across the room by rolling over and over and over...) and I am going to be exhausted, but we are so excited about all of the wonderful things to come.

I was really awakened to how blessed we are when I read that the girl who runs a website I frequent (mom4life.com) lost her baby boy at 37 weeks. They discovered that he no longer had a heartbeat and she had to deliver her sweet angel, only to bury him days later. For someone I don't even know, her story haunted me. It tore at my heart and I thought about it a lot. It isn't fair. But her faith in God is awe-inspiring. She trusts in God's will and is being so faithful. I admire that. It opened my eyes to hear her story, and it made me all the more thankful for the beautiful baby girl napping in the room next to me. I don't know how I could be so blessed, but I am thankful.

In other news, my grandpa took a pretty nasty fall last Monday. He fractured a vertebrae in his neck and has been fitted with a 'halo' (one of those metal things they screw into your head). He'll be in that for 3 months. If you read this, please take a minute to lift him up in prayer, that he would remain in good spirits and that he would not encounter any setbacks that would keep him from returning to life as usual fairly soon. Thanks! Kat wants her great-grandpa to be able to come down and visit again!

Feliz!

2008-05-05T22:54:00.000-07:00

Cinco de Mayo! After I posted that last one I realized it was Cinco de Mayo. A year ago today, we had our friends over for a fiesta and announced that our guest room would be transformed into a nursery in the coming months! Oh, how time flies!

New Lens!

2008-05-05T22:33:00.000-07:00

I splurged and bought a new lens for my camera (ok, it isn't a big splurge... it is the cheapest lens you can get, but it is SO cool!). Here are a few from my first times playing with it:

Takes some getting used to... it doesn't zoom, so I have to do the work of moving around, but that is kind of neat. I have also discovered the beauty of shooting in RAW- very cool! It gives you so much more control in editing (i.e. it makes my pics look so much better than they actually come out looking, since I'm no pro). I'm even shooting in manual mode, people... adios, "Auto" mode!

Kate is more and more fantastic all the time and even when I think it is impossible to be any more in love with her, I find myself more in love with her each day. Today I realized how frightening love can be. As I watched tv, there was a teaser to a story that would be aired on 48 Hours or one of those mystery shows: a nanny accused of killing this little baby girl. I felt physically ill. Who could do that? What would I do if someone tried to hurt my daughter? The answer scares me. I felt like a lioness. A mother bear. If someone tried to harm my Kathryn, my cub, Lord help them. Even the very thought of it made this... I can only explain it as a 'heat', build up inside of me... scary. I'm not a violent person, and I'm certainly not the strongest. But God forbid anyone should threaten harm upon my family, there is a primal part of me that would do anything to protect her. Rawr.

Whoo. That was heavy. On a lighter note, my amazing, wonderful and always thoughtful Matt watched the lovebug today so I could go use my Glen Ivy gift certificates today with my mom! Now, pre-natal massages were great. Super. But it was SO fantastic to get a real-deal massage today! The facial was excellent as well. Ooh. I feel refreshed! And do you know how long it's been since I was able to enjoy a hot tub? Over 16 months, I can tell you that, because hot tubs are a "no no" when you're pregnant. It was amaaaaaazing! So thanks, Matty-C... Best. Husband. Ever.

Well, it's off to bed for me. Hooray for sleep!

5 Months!

2008-04-21T12:41:00.000-07:00

April 18th marked 5 months of life for our little lady! Cuter than ever, she is quickly outgrowing her monkey! For the 5 month picture, poor Monkey's little green flower is missing from his body... one morning, as Kat wrestled Monkey in her crib, she pulled the flower right off! I could stitch it back on easily enough, but it is likely she'll just pull it off again, and I wouldn't want her to choke on it (since everything goes in the mouth these days).

It's hard to believe we're coming up on 6 months... for some reason it seems like 6 months is a big milestone. My 'mini-goal' for nursing was to make it to 6 months then decide from there whether to continue or to wean... I haven't made up my mind yet. I know the AAP (American Academy of Pediatrics) recommends a year, and it is way cheaper than formula (free, in fact... I don't charge per ounce), but we'll see. Maybe we'll go until she has teeth. Maybe we'll go a year. I don't know yet. Some days I am ready to give up... other days I love that personal time I have with her. It's a toss up right now.

The highchair got put together today... I put her in it for a minute and she wasn't quite sure. We've tried cereal a couple of times now, but she seemed not so excited. So we waited another week and tried again this morning. She was a little more enthusiastic, so perhaps I'll start giving her a little every morning to get her in the routine, then see whether to start adding in other foods. I'm not in a rush, but I want to do it the right way. I just had her on my lap this morning, instead of trying to add the highchair into the mix. I think she needs to be a little more comfortable with the idea of the food before we do the chair. Solid food experiences are funny... check out the look we got the last time we gave her cereal!

She's growing and changing all the time and is so much fun... what an adventure!

Hey- how'd you get over there?!

2008-04-15T21:15:00.000-07:00

So our days of leaving the room for a minute are over. I can no longer leave Kate on her playmat for a few minutes while I make breakfast or go to the bathroom. On Monday, Matt and I put her on her playmat and stepped into the kitchen to make lunch. When Matt peeked in to check on her, she had scooted a good 2 feet forward and was right up next to a chair leg, that she easily could have bumped her head against. Who knows what else she might get into! Sooo... baby proofing must begin. It is amazing, too, how fast it happens! Today at the office, I laid her on her belly in the middle of a blanket to play. I turned around in my chair, opened my e-mail, clicked "Get Mail" and turned around to see what she was doing while my mail came in... and she was a foot off the blanket! She just looked up at me like, "What?" So funny!

She's starting to get pretty good at doing the 'tripod'- sitting up and putting her hands on the ground to keep balanced. She usually starts to fall over after about 45 seconds to 1 minute, but that is pretty good, I think!

I've been playing with my camera more and definitely learning more about Photoshop and how to edit my pictures so they look even better. It's a lot of fun... but poor Kat- she is going to be looking at a camera for the rest of her life. I just want to capture every minute!

I was thinking about how quickly she grows, and here is just a brief list of things I always want to remember:
- how pink she was when she was born
- how tiny she was!
- what it felt like to wake up and see her laying in the bassinet next to me that first night in the hospital... so surreal and amazing
- how big her coming home outfit was on her
- the way she'd open her mouth all the time like a little baby bird
- the way she held her hands when she'd eat
- the adorable face she'd make when she was waking up... her eyebrows would raise and she'd shake her head back and forth. We never caught it on camera, though, and now she doesn't do it anymore :(
- the 'pooping' face... it is kind of an Elvis lip curl
- her first smile
- the time she laughed in her sleep and I almost melted into a puddle right there
- her first real laugh... bouncing on Matt's knee and listening to Nora Jones
- the noises she makes when you put your face right up in front of hers... she squeals and it is so cute!
- the smile she gives me when I come in to get her in the morning... like she's so happy to see me
- the night time feedings where she falls asleep and I can't bear the thought of putting her down... sleeping babies have to be a little glimpse of heaven...
- seeing her learn and become more alert and active
- seeing the smile spread across her face when her daddy walks in the room

There are so many other things that I can't even begin to list them all. She changes so much, but it gets better everyday. I always swell with pride when people comment on how cute, how beautiful and how perfect our daughter is. Of course, we are biased, but seriously... she is extraordinarily beautiful! More importantly, I think she is going to grow into a sweet, loving and caring little girl... that is my hope. This song, called "Pray", by Kendall Payne is such a beautiful illustration of the faith I hope that Kathryn grows in... life won't always be easy and perfect, but I pray that it develops her character and helps her to grow in faith:

"Pray" by Kendall Payne
I will pray for you now, for you have been my faithful friend
While the road we walk is difficult, indeed
I could not ask for more than what you've already been
Only that you would say these prayers for me
May your heart break enough that compassion enters in
May your strength all be spent upon the weak
All the castles and crowns you build and place upon your head
May they all fall, come crashing down around your feet
May you find every step to be harder than the last
So your character grows greater each stride
May your company be of humble insignificance
May your weakness be your only source of pride
What you do unto others may it all be done to you
May you meet the One who made us
And see Him smile when life is through
May your blessings be many, but not what you hoped they'd be
And when you look upon the broken
May mercy show you what you could not see
May you never be sure of any plans you desire
But you'd learn to trust the plan He has for you
May your passions be tried and tested in the holy fire
May you fight with all your life for what is true
I have prayed for you now all my dear and faithful friends
But what I wish is more than I could ever speak
As the way wanders on I'll long to see you once again
Until then, would you pray these prayers for me?
Oh, that you would pray for me

The 4-month Check-up

2008-04-07T22:32:00.000-07:00

Kat had her 4 month well baby visit today... she is now 16lbs. 10 oz. and 24 1/2 inches long! She's in the 90th percentile in weight and 60th in height- that's our dainty little flower.

Dr. Dyer said she is ahead with all her milestones and that she looks perfect- hooray! We even got the green light to start solids as soon as we want. I'm not in a rush, but seeing as she is hungry so much these days, maybe we'll go ahead and give it a try.

We have started using Kat's activity center and it is super funny! There is a keyboard with jungle animals that all represent different musical genres... the zebra cracks me up because it is a deep, black man's voice that says, "I am a ZEBRA! I have STRIPES!" You can't quite grasp how funny it sounds without hearing it... but here is what Kat thinks about it:

Oh, poop.

2008-04-04T14:40:00.000-07:00

4 days. In a row. Kat has blown out her diaper and it goes EVERYWHERE! On Wednesday, it was up to her armpits. Seriously sick. I have grown immune to being grossed out by these explosions, but it is just a pain! I carry two extra onesies and a pair of Babylegs with me wherever we go (Babylegs are great! Check them out: http://www.babylegs.net/) just in case of disasters.

I think we may have gotten a bad box of diapers, because this never seemed to happen before. I think she is in the right size, too. Hmm, who knows.

Kat is through the first hour of a nap in her crib and is still sleeping! Wowwy! I'm so proud. Now if she would just go down at night without pitching a fit, I'd be even more excited! Every night this week, she'll eat, sleep for about an hour, then wake up crying... trying to soothe her back to sleep takes a good hour some nights. Matt is great at it, though. Phew!

I think that it all for our adventures lately... we're fast approaching month #5! In an attempt to learn a bit about taking pictures with backlight, check out the cheeky little smile we caught... isn't she the most?!

Easter!

2008-03-27T21:34:00.001-07:00

So, as usual, Easter was a crazy day for me. I had to be to church by 7:15am to start getting ready for our annual Pancake Breakfast youth fundraiser. By the time church was over and we were at Ron & Barbara's house, I was beat!

Kat did well- she is such a good baby! Check out the Easter dress! She wasn't too happy about it in the first picture, but had her bunny and was much more content in the second one! Being in such a rush that morning, I completely forgot to pack in a change of clothes for later. Luckily, we were able to borrow some things from Sydney's closet to make it through the rest of the day.

Amy and the girls will soon be returning to Japan and I, of course, am pretty bummed. It is so fun to have them here and see the girls grow. I feel like they'll be so different the next time they come back to the states... ok, so I don't just "feel" that... it is true! They change so quickly at this age! Skye will certainly be talking like a pro and done with diapers all together... Sydney will probably be walking all over the place and look so different... ahhh! There are little girls growing up all around me! I know Kate will change so much, too. It is hard for me to picture her as a "little girl" as opposed to a baby girl, but I know she is sure to be so SO cute! :)

Here is a cute picture from Easter- Skye and Kat both sporting their bunny ears:

They are so cute- and check out Madison... she loves these little girls! What a cool family :) I'm sure Kate's life will be filled with so many embarrassing moments created by this family, but I do hope she realizes, one day, how amazingly blessed she is to be surrounded by so many people who love and adore her. On that note, I leave you with this picture... because the expression on her face kills me!

A New Chapter in Motherhood

2008-03-22T22:00:00.000-07:00

Yes, it is official: I have a mom haircut.

I've spent the past 4 months wearing my hair in a ponytail, and I'm over it. Today I went and got the mom cut. Short, just under the chin, side bangs and I must say- I think it looks pretty cute!

Now, much to Kat's dismay, she can no longer grab a handful of my hair and put it in her mouth... therefore, I am free from the ponytail! Woohoo!

Freedom!

2008-03-20T09:23:00.000-07:00

Kat is officially done with the swaddling business- completely! Now that she is sleeping without swaddling, we have come across a bit of a concern for me: she flips over onto her belly! Everyone now makes such a big deal about putting baby down to sleep on their back to prevents SIDS (sudden infant death syndrome). Supposedly, they are safe to sleep on their bellies once they're strong enough to flip over... but it still keeps me up at night! I know it is ridiculous and that many, many people were put to sleep on their bellies and lived (my whole generation grew up sleeping on their bellies), but now that they make such a big deal about it, I find myself in Kat's room at 3:00am staring at her to see if she is actually breathing. Sometimes I have to stand there and stare for a good 10 minutes, just to be sure. Crazy!

However, now that she has discovered the beauty of tummy sleep, she is sleeping through the night consistently. Woo hoo!

She turned 4-months this week and she is just more beautiful than ever! She laughs, coos, plays independently and is changing so quickly. Look how big she is now compared to her monkey!

Easter is on Sunday (the earliest I've ever experienced it) and you know she is going to look adorable in her frilly little dress! In the meantime, I had to be the crazy mom and put bunny ears on her... but holy moly, she is so cute!

So that's what we've been up to... sleeping on our bellies and wearing bunny ears! Fun!

Operation: Unswaddle... Successful!

2008-03-13T20:54:00.000-07:00

Well, I have been stressing about how we were going to wean Kate off of swaddling. I was having nightmares; visions of being up all night with a crying, flailing-armed baby. I was avoiding it at all costs thinking, "Maybe we can swaddle her until she leaves for college".

Fortunately for us, she decided she was ready on her own. Tuesday night, she woke around 1:00am to eat and I wrapped her up to put her back to bed. She would not go back to sleep, so I rocked her in the glider for a while, thinking she would succumb to sleep. As we rocked, she never stopped fighting to break her arms free from the swaddle. So, I unwrapped her and wrapped the blanket just around her body with her arms free... and she slept! For 5 hours, woohoo!

*Sidenote: Bon Jovi's "Living on a Prayer" was just dubbed the #1 song of the 80's on VH1 and I have to say, that is a pretty good pick.*

So... she is growing and learning and changing everyday. i am looking forward to the day she is totally independent from the swaddle and we can just plop her in her crib and let her soothe herself off to sleep! I don't want her to grow up too fast, though... she's still my little sweet pea!

One year ago, yesterday...

2008-03-06T22:29:00.000-08:00

One year ago yesterday, I stood staring at myself in the mirror. I looked at myself and said, "I'm pregnant! Oh my Gosh- I'M PREGNANT?!"

Yep. It has been one year since I peed on a stick and learned that in approximately 36 weeks I would become a mommy. I remember every emotion I had that morning. Joy, fear, disbelief and worry. I worried I'd miscarry. I worried Matt would tell me he wasn't ready (totally illegitimate fear, but hey- your brain goes through every scenario when that plus sign pops up). I worried that I wasn't fit to be a mom. I worried that I would soon begin vomiting every morning (which, by the way, never happened- the first time I threw up while I was pregnant was while I was in labor!).

One year later, that tiny little bundle of cells has become the most beautiful, sweetest, most wonderful little girl ever! I don't think I could have even pictured how perfect she would be.

If I am honest, I miss being pregnant. I loved it. Looking back at posts from when I was at the end of my pregnancy, you may question that statement. However, I really did love it. Knowing you're carrying life inside of you is something that only someone who has been pregnant can understand. Feeling that life move for the first time is breathtaking (and becomes LITERALLY breathtaking once they get big and start pressing against your lungs). I miss my big ol' belly (and not having to suck it in). Being pregnant is the coolest. We're not looking to add to the family for quite some time, but I will be excited when we do.

Kat remains amazing- I love her more everyday. She is a rolly-polly now and can roll from back to tummy like a champ... and if she really wants to, can roll tummy to back. She is a super baby! So advanced ;-)

What a week!

2008-03-01T09:23:00.000-08:00

Our little girl is growing up! Now, usually, I am opposed to her growing up... but this week she started sleeping through the night. Not just until 4am... but on Thursday night, she slept until 8:20am!!!!!! Amazing! I think the new combination of pajamas and the SwaddleMe blanket have joined forces to create a super sleeper! Although last night she did wake twice, but I think that is because she squirms and bumps her head against the side of the crib... I think we'll tone down the incline on her mattress a bit and see if that helps.

I also learned a valuable lesson on Tuesday: no matter how long it has been since she ate, spit up is still possible. I picked her up from the changing table, held her over my head and started telling her how wonderful she is when suddenly, she spat up... IN MY MOUTH!!!! NOOOOOOO! My instinctual reaction was to spit it out, which all ended up back on her face. She started crying, because she didn't know why I was freaking out... meanwhile, I am gagging. I had to put her in her crib and run to the bathroom for a thorough mouth washing. It had been 2 hours since she'd eaten, too, which meant the milk was all curdled and nasty... oh man... it was filthy. Then I had to go in and console her and reassure her that I knew she didn't do it on purpose. Poor little bug.

Well, as I type this, she has just spit up all over herself again, so I guess I'd better go take care of that. Over and out!

Nerd Alert!

2008-02-26T22:40:00.001-08:00

I just spent some time looking through pictures of Kat at the hospital the day she was born and from her first few days home and got totally emotional! It's only been 3 months for crying out loud!

I'm a wreck. What am I going to be like when she is 25?!!?

Sleeping through the night...

2008-02-26T13:16:00.000-08:00

is AMAZING! Last night, Kat slept from about 10pm until 5:50am! So incredibly beautiful! She has made the transition to her crib quite nicely... I think it was harder on me to move her out of our room than it was on her! She definitely sleeps better now that she doesn't slip out of her papasan seat and doesn't get woken up each time Matt or I turn over in bed. She is doing so great in her crib the past couple nights- I love it! We're still swaddling her, but that is ok... I think as long as it helps her get a good nights' sleep, then it is ok. Everything I've read says we'll know when it is time to break her from the swaddle habit- guess we'll see!

She is such a good girl and I am so blessed! Poor thing though, she must have the most sensitive skin! We got the infected neck under control, and now she has some infection on her toe! Geez. So, she is getting antibiotics 3x a day for 10 days... hopefully that will clear it up. If it isn't one thing with this girl, it is another! Oh well- I'd much rather deal with these minor irritations than with some of the terrible illnesses that have been going around! Rotavirus, RSV and the flu are rampant right now... I do not want her to have to go through that, so we're big on handwashing these days!

She is doing so well... I love our baby!

3 Months Old!

2008-02-18T22:21:00.000-08:00

It is hard to believe that at this time three months ago, I was laying in bed at Hoag Hospital, staring at this perfect little baby that had just made her entrance into the world... I was ecstatic, sore, tired, scared, joyous, overwhelmed and mystified by everything the future now held.

Holding my daughter was surreal. I was scared- I didn't know anything about newborns. I was scared to hold her, carry her, change her bathe her... it was all so foreign.

Now, only 3 months later, it seems like she has always been a part of our family. All of the aforementioned tasks are second nature. Getting up in the middle of the night is no longer a new, exhausting schedule- it is just what I do. What did we ever do without her? She is the greatest joy in this world. Her smile makes everything okay. Her laugh wipes away every crappy part of my day. Watching Matt swoon over her erases 25 years of not having a father of my own. She is nothing less than a perfect blessing that God has surely graced us with.

Today we took her to see her great-grand aunt Virginia (Aunt Gin). Though it breaks my heart that due to the evil disease known as Dementia, Aunt Gin didn't know who I was, let alone who Kathryn was, it comforts me to know that they did meet, even if only briefly before Aunt Gin fell back asleep. I don't know how much longer it will be before Aunt Gin enters into eternal life, but I know that when she does, she will be able to appreciate Kathryn more when she is there than she can while she is still here.

It is getting to be past my usual bedtime (rather early now that sleep is so precious), and I'm fading quickly. Off to bed I go... I'm guessing I have 2-3 hours before my sweet girl is up and so am I! To leave on a happy note, here are some 3 month pictures!

A little factoid for you:

2008-02-13T16:40:00.001-08:00

Did you know you can get a yeast infection on your neck? Yes, indeedy. And if anyone was going to teach me that, of course it was going to be my sweet daughter. Poor little girl ended up with a yeast infection in her little neck folds! Since she can't hold her head up consistently yet, and since the insides of those little folds never get any air, there were some funky things going on in there... and it really worked itself into a frenzy. It was so red and for three nights she was so uncomfortable that the only way she'd sleep was if she was being held. Made for a loooong night for Matt and I. Especially since I've been fighting a nasty cold. Luckily the doctor showed us what to do and she has been more comfortable and the redness has gone down almost completely.

Now, of course, she has some little infection on her toe... what the heck??! If it isn't one thing, it's another! Oh well, I am definitely thankful that we're only dealing with minor irritations and not serious problems.

I got a book about my new camera and am studying it thoroughly! There is so much to learn and absorb, but it is fun. Here are a couple of pictures I've taken so far:

The last one was edited with Photoshop to make it look cool- though the original picture was pretty cute, too.

Well, that is all that is going on in the Conrad house... fighting sickness and yeast infections, taking pictures and just hanging out. Almost to 3 months with our little girl! Updates to come.

If you are the inventor of baby swings...

2008-02-08T14:09:00.000-08:00

...I will kiss you on the mouth. No, seriously. You are amazing.

The only way I get anything done (and the only way Kat naps) is because of her swing. And to all you who call swings "Neglect-O-Matics"- shut up. My daughter is VERY well taken care of, very cuddled and spends plenty of time not in her swing THANKYOUVERYMUCH!

Soooo, I got my new camera... and I won't lie, it's cool. Now I just need to figure out how the heck to use it. The fully automatic mode takes some great shots, but I want the real deal. I bought a book and am looking for a class... we'll see. I tried to do a little "photoshoot" with Kat yesterday, but she was in her Fussypants McGee personna, so it didn't last long. We'll try again today, of course.

The last two nights, darling Kathryn has forgotten that she is no longer a newborn... meaning, she has been waking up every two hours again! Weak! I only fed her twice... the other two time I just re-swaddled her and put her back down. What a crazy little monkey.

3 Years Together!

2008-02-05T08:55:00.000-08:00

Today is our 3rd wedding anniversary! In some ways, it seems like it was just yesterday... in other ways it seems like we've been married forever! Not in a bad way... it just feels so natural- like it has always been this way.

We were so cute- so excited to go out and start our life together.

Matt is the greatest husband... I never imagined I could end up with such a wonderful man. So funny to look back at middle school when I used to cry and wish I had a boyfriend- someone to love me and make me feel special. Summer would tell me that one day I'd find someone... then I had my high school relationship. It lasted almost 3 years, but in my heart I knew I'd never marry him. We weren't right for each other in that way. And then there was Matt...

Scott told me one day that I should date his roommate. In fact, I think his exact words were, "You should go out with my roommate. You guys could get married." I didn't want to be hooked up through Scott, so I scoffed at first. Then, I gave in and said, "Ok, Scott... hook it up." I started at Concordia and would come over to hang out with them often... the rest is history. And here we are three years later with a perfect little girl and happier than I could ever ask!

On Sunday, Kat and my mom were baptized! It was cool to have them baptized together- what a special day! My mom decided she was ready to do that, and it means a lot to me. Kate looked so funny in her big, puffy white dress!

We had a little get together over at Matt's mom & dad's house following the service and then stayed to watch the Super Bowl (which I watched very little of... not really into football).

Kate had her 10-week check up yesterday. She is 13lbs. 4oz. and 22 3/4 inches long. She is in the 90th percentile for her age! Big girl! The doctor said she looks great and is ahead of the game developmentally with her social interaction and her neck control! She even said that the way Kat was holding herself up while laying on her belly was what a typical 4-month old would be doing. She is a super baby! She got her first round of immunizations, which wasn't fun. Poor baby. She had to have one oral vaccine and 4 injections. She didn't realize that it hurt until about the middle of the second shot when her sweet little face contorted into a full blown angry face! She started wailing and I couldn't help but cry a little bit... poor little thing! She made it through, though, and is doing just fine today.

So baptism Sunday, first shots Monday and our anniversary today... fun, fun!

Don't Lift Your Baby by Their Head

2008-02-01T13:31:00.000-08:00

David and Kelly Sopp put out an amazing book called, Safe Baby Handling Tips. Here are a few choice excerpts:

Funny- Kat loves the dryer... it's so toasty.

We're at 10 1/2 weeks now and life is great! Our girl is growing so fast and is getting to be more and more fun everyday! She laughed for the first time on Januray 22nd and it was amazing! I'll admit, I teared up. She laughs if you bounce her on your knee and sing to her... it's a crack up!

Life with a baby is definitely different... but for whatever reason, it makes sense. After not even 3 months, it feels like life is just supposed to be this way. She comes to work with me during the week and that has gotten SO much better! She hated it at first, and wouldn't nap at all. But here we are, almost a month later, and she is almost into two hours of a nap! I had to get a little travel swing to help her nap, but hey, it's survival around here.

I have to laugh at how content I am now that I never wear make-up and am covered in spit-up half of everyday. Who knew vanity and shame would disappear with the birth of your child? I do; however, find myself embarrassed by one thing: the mommy voice. You know what I am talking about, don't you? It's that voice that haunts every video of our daughter. The high-pitched, squeaky, voice of a woman who's dignity has been stolen by a tiny, bundle of love. "Hey you! Hey you!", "Smile for mommy!", "You love your daddy, don't you?", "Where's my girl... THERE SHE IS!" Don't laugh: this, too, can happen to you.

We moved up to size 2 diapers yesterday, and though it hurts my heart a little bit to know she has grown so much, it brings me great joy because I know we will experience fewer 'blow-outs' with a correctly fitting diaper.

2 Months Old!

2008-01-21T08:35:00.000-08:00

This little girl is getting so big! It is funny- we are with her and see her everyday, so we don't notice her change in size as much! Wow- what a growing girl!

We've had two nights now where Kate has "slept through the night". Before I was a parent, the term "sleeping through the night" was something much different than it is to me now. When parents would talk about their babies sleeping through the night, I assumed that they meant sleeping from 8pm to 8am. Sounded great! I've come to learn; however, that sleeping through the night is more like 9pm to 5:30am. I don't think I've ever been so excited to get to sleep *only* until 5:30am. The difference between waking up at 12:30, then 2:30, then 4:30, then 6:30; and then getting to sleep from 10pm to 5:30am is better than you can even begin to imagine. She hasn't given us (and when I say "us" I actually mean "me"... Matt sleeps peacefully through the 2:30am feeding) another one of those beautiful nights in a while, though. She'll come around.

I'm trying to wean her (and myself, let's be honest) off the swing. I don't mind putting her it in to calm her down and get her drowsy, but I'd like to start getting her used to her crib. She has taken one 45 minute nap in there. That is it. Looking back, it cracks me up that when I ordered the crib, I was so nervous it wouldn't be here by the time I delivered... but it made it in plenty of time. And yet, here it is 2 months into Kat's life, and she has only slept in it one time.

We got her a little seat called a "Bumbo" and she loves it! We don't leave her in it for too long yet, since she is still building head & neck strength, but she does great in it for short periods of time!

Kate had her first boat ride this past Saturday, when we rented a patio boat on Mission Viejo lake and went out with Chris Baldwin and his girlfriend, Carly. It was such a beautiful day (only in So. Cal!) and I forsee Kat being a houseboat driver of the next generation. Ok, maybe not, but you never know.

I think that is it for now... many more Kat tales to come!

Now I Get It.

2008-01-07T15:23:00.000-08:00

It only took having a baby to understand my mother's neurosis.

Now I get why, even now at 25 years old, she still has me call after I get home to let her know I'm safe. Now I get why she would get so upset when I did something to put myself in danger. Now I get why she wouldn't let me drive late at night or go to Mexico with Summer's family... these are all things I hope Kate will understand, too, when she has a daughter. She is the most precious thing in my life... now I get it.

While I was feeding her last night, her tiny hand found the edge of my tank top and her little fingers hooked right on, and she held on so tightly, as if I'd leave her if she let go. She eventually stopped eating, and fell into a deep sleep with her right hand curled under her chin and her left hand still holding mommy down.

I scooped her up, swaddled her back up and rocked her as I walked over to lay her back down to sleep. For whatever reason, every motherly cell in my body cried, "Stop! Don't put her down! She is growing so fast- watch her every minute, or else she will grow and you'll miss it!"

Honestly, I don't know where the last seven weeks have gone. That sounds like such an old person thing to say, but truly. I look at the pictures from the hospital and I am shocked at how big she is now. It feels like so long ago I laid in the hospital bed and the doctor put this little, pink, squirming 7 pound girl on my belly... now she is 12 pounds, bright-eyed and the smiliest little thing. She is stronger than I thought any 7-week old could be and wants to stand already... she pushes with her legs and stops fussing the minute you hold her up to 'stand'. She can't walk too soon- she just can't- because I can't bear the thought of my tiny baby girl walking away from me! DON'T GROW UP TOO FAST, KATIE-BABY! YOU HEAR ME?!

So now I get it. I finally get the look in my mom's eyes as I came down the aisle on my wedding day. Her little girl had learned to walk and was walking away from her. It all makes perfect sense now.

But for now, she is in her swing... she can't crawl, she can't walk, she can't run... she can just grab on to me with her tiny fingers and keep me close for now!

Happy New Year!

2008-01-05T15:51:00.000-08:00

We're 5 days into 2008 and it is a new year like no other before! Our little one is growing so fast and it was great to have her over the holidays with us for the first time.

Christmas was a blast- even though she is far too young to understand what Christmas is, it was still a great time! She looked so cute in her Christmas outfit that Matt's mom bought for her! We went to Ron & Barbara's house, as usual, and my mom and grandpa came down, too. It was a full house: Ron, Barbara, Lorna, Ben, Eloise, Chris, Madison, Cameron, Ryan, Beth, mom, grandpa, Matt, Kate and myself. We all definitely missed having Amy, Mike, Skye and Sydney around this year. We had a wonderful dinner, opened gifts (the ever popular 'gift exchange' was a hit for us- we took home the ice cream maker- woohoo!).

New Year's Eve was very mellow this year- we weren't up for a party with a 6 week old! So we stayed in, our family of three, and went to bed shortly after midnight. We're shooting for a healthier lifestyle this year... we slacked off on our walking once I was pregnant and unable to do too much exercise, so hopefully we will work our way back into that (although this week is supposed to be super rainy- not good for our walks), and we've said "Adios" to the ice cream, cookies, and general crap that we have been eating these past few months. We've both been guilty of "letting ourselves go", though I have had the benefit of losing some weight because of breastfeeding- so we're off to a new start this year.

Having a baby is a pretty crazy ride. For 7 weeks our lives have been dramatically different than they have ever been before. My days are filled with diapers, feedings, trying to fend off the fussies, smiles, joy, anxiety and small bouts of sleep.

Our house is a disaster- Christmas decorations still hanging on to their last few moments of glory before being packed away for another year, tiny socks strewn everywhere, a living room filled with a swing, a papasan seat, a play mat, a car seat, a boppy and cloth diaper burp rags in every room in the house. It is crazy, but I wouldn't change it for anything.

Kat is simply amazing to me. Sometimes I could just stare at her endlessly... except for at about 3am. I must say, she is sleeping much better at night- we usually get at least one 5-6 hour stretch, then another 3-4 bout. She smiles so much now and it is the most fulfilling feeling to have her make eye contact with you, recognize you and give you a big, toothless grin!

We love her! 13 days until we have a 2 month old!

One month old!

2007-12-22T10:04:00.000-08:00

Kate turned one month on the 18th and she couldn't be more phenomenal! She is growing so fast and already weighs 10lbs. 9oz. as of the 19th! Big girl! She is starting to sleep for longer stretches at night which is pretty much amazing... last night she slept from about 10pm until almost 4am! That is six hours of sleepy bliss for me. I actually ended up having to unwrap her swaddle to get her to start waking up because I needed to feed her... I was in some pain from going so long without feeding her.

After I fed her last night, it was about 4:30am and I just didn't want to put her down. She was all cuddled up on my chest, sound asleep, and my brain started going. I realized how blessed I am. With my daughter on my chest and my husband asleep next to me, I felt like everything was right with the world. What a wonderful little family I have! I got a little choked up... I'll admit it. Eventually I put her back down and she slept for another 4 hours... amazing!

The first month has been such a period of learning. Nursing is finally something I can enjoy- instead of crying and hating every minute of it. I thought women were liars when they said "it gets better," but it really does. I never knew how many diapers a newborn baby could go through. Holy crap! No pun intended... Seriously, I change her wet pants before I feed her, then she poops in the clean diaper, then I change her again and it isn't long before we hear her let loose again. I read, while I was pregnant, that a breastfed baby should have a dirty diaper for every feeding... but I guess I just didn't realize how often that was. Dang! Supposedly she will start pooping less now that she is one month old. We'll see!

She has started smiling and it is the best thing in the world! She only does it in response to seeing someone else smile right now... I guess that is how their brains work, but it is amazing! She is going to be such a charmer. Look out, Daddy! The other night she giggled in her sleep and I just about melted into a puddle of goo right there. It was the cutest thing ever!

Matt is probably the greatest dad in the world. For real. He adores her so much and it makes my heart all fuzzy and warm. I really value that, since my dad wasn't around for me. I have a whole new love and respect for Matt that I can't really explain... there is nothing like seeing your husband become a dad.

I am so excited for Christmas- our first Christmas as a family of three! This little girl is going to be SO spoiled... I can already tell. It is so special to my mom and my grandpa, too, to have a new little one at Christmas time. Especially for my grandpa, since with all the scares we've had with his health, we never knew if he'd get to see this day. He tells me everytime he holds her how happy he is that he got to be here to see her. It is so special to me, too. I hope she will know how much he adores her.

Ok, now that I have made myself cry, I will use the rest of this time that she is sleeping to eat some breakfast and pick up around the house. Many more stories to come!

2 1/2 Weeks Later...

2007-12-06T19:37:00.000-08:00

I can't believe we have had our baby girl for almost 3 weeks now! Things are going well- learning more everyday and things are getting easier! It is amazing how our bodies can adapt to living on so little sleep! Last night she went for a 4-hour stretch of sleep! Woohoo! You know you're a new parent when you're excited to sleep for only 4 hours, as opposed to 1 1/2 - 2 hours!

She is already changing so much and losing that 'newborn' look, at least I think so! She is starting to look like a "baby" instead of a "newborn", if that makes sense!

Here is a fun little creation I made of a few of her pictures:

Make a scrapbook!

Miss Thanksgiving? No way, Jose!

2007-11-22T08:11:00.000-08:00

Why wait until Thanksgiving? Kathryn decided she would want to take advantage of all the cuddles she could get at a family gathering on Turkey Day, so she made her appearance before our scheduled induction. Here, you will find the "play-by-play"!

On Saturday, the 17th, Matt and I decided to make a regular old day out of it so that I wouldn't be sitting around and pouting about still being pregnant. We slept in, then went to Crystal Cove, one of our favorite places, for some lunch. We ate at the snack shack, then went down and walked on the beach for a little bit. Matt didn't want to go too far down the beach, just in case I were to go into labor... I kind of giggled to myself that that certainly wouldn't be happening, but agreed with him. I had been having Braxton Hicks contractions all day, but nothing painful to be excited about.

After that, we headed home to hang out until 4:30 when we were going to go to a local church to see what all the fuss is about with their Saturday night service. We came home, turned on the TV and were hanging out on the couch... I promptly drifted into a little nap. I woke up around 3:30pm to some painful contractions. It was kind of like period cramps. "Hmm," I thought. I got up, freshened up and we went over to the church service (which wasn't what we imagined it to be, by the way). I had a couple of contractions during the service and it was more difficult to stand up, sit down and walk... I just felt heavier.

Came home, ate some dinner and parked it on the couch. By 6:30pm I was starting to feel the contractions irregularly... pretty far apart, not very long, but definitely there. Around 8pm I was really restless and wanted to get out and go to the grocery store, but Matt thought it might not be a good idea. I huffed and puffed that I wasn't in labor and it was no big deal, but ended up deciding he was probably right and I should chill out... just to be on the safe side.

We went to bed around 11:00pm... by 11:30 the contractions had started becoming very regular. We got out a pen and paper and started timing. About 5 minutes apart each time, usually close to 1 minute long and getting progressively more painful... oh crap! I remembered the "5-1-1" rule: call your doctor when your contractions are 5 minutes apart, 1 minute in length, for a period of 1 hour... you may be in labor! So we timed for over an hour, then called the doctor. It was about 1:00am at this point. Doctor said to time for another 30 minutes and if they were still regular to head to the hospital.

30 minutes later, we were on our way to Hoag! The car ride was surreal... there were so few cars on the 405 and it was a little foggy and I couldn't believe we were doing this! We checked in to the Labor & Delivery floor a little after 2:00am on Sunday, the 18th. They put me in a room, checked me out and basically said I was definitely having contractions, but wasn't dilated at all. They had us walk around the L&D ward for 30 minutes to see if that would move things along, and sure enough next time they checked I had begun to dilate... we wouldn't be leaving that hospital without a baby now!

They put in the IV which was maybe one of the worst parts about the whole experience! It hurt SO bad! I don't recall ever loudly exclaiming, "OWW!" when getting an IV, but dang! I sure did this time! I didn't watch, but when I looked at Matt he had gone white and had to sit down. After she got it in and "cleaned me up" I looked and my fingernails all had blood under them. Matt later told me that blood shot on the floor and it had been a pretty big mess. What the heck!?

They had me walk a little bit later for another 30 minutes and this time I had to stop several times because the contractions were getting intense. Matt was so great the whole time... right by my side. After we got back in the room and checked me again, they decided to give me Pitocin to get the contractions going better and get the process really moving. They hooked me up to the Pitocin around 6:00am and a doctor came in and broke my water (what a sick feeling, by the way... to feel the flood gates open- so glad that didn't happen in public somewhere). At 7:00am we made a few phone calls to let people know I was having the baby sometime that day. Contractions were pretty strong at this point and I couldn't really rest. I don't remember much from that point... just being checked on a lot and concentrating on breathing through the contractions. They told me to let them know when I needed the pain meds (which I had already told them I would want eventually- bring on the epidural), but I was trying to put it off for a while.

By about 9:45am I was shaking with every contraction, sweating and in notable pain. Matt's mom and dad showed up somewhere before then... then went down for some breakfast in the cafe. Matt's brother, Ryan, arrived just in time to see me start to sweat profusely then proceed to toss my cookies into one of those pink, kidney shaped dishes. Sorry, Ryan. And sorry, Matt! He was awesome- holding my hand, cleaning me up... I was just embarrassed that I had just puked in front of him and his brother. Matt called my mom and told her to head down... I think he could tell I needed my mommy!

The nurse came in and said the anesthesiologist would be going in for a c-section soon and would be unavailable for an hour, so if I wanted the epidural I could get it now or wait an hour. GIVE IT TO ME NOW!!! Getting the epi was not bad at all... the worst part was just trying to keep still through a contraction (by this point I was shaking violently through them and writhing in pain) so she could place it. The nurse, Mary (who was amazing, by the way), held me and helped me get through them while I got the epi. It was cake... so NOT painful at all. I highly recommend epi's to all laboring women- they are a gift from God!

Once that was done, Matt's mom, dad and brother came back and we visited for a bit. My mom and grandpa arrived and we visited too. They all got some lunch downstairs while Matt and I napped... it had already been a long night/day. We got a nice nap before they returned.

The nurse kept checking the baby's heartrate and began to get concerned that her heartrate dropped sharply with each contraction. They stopped the Pitocin and monitored her... the nurse gave me the news that if this continued much longer, I would be getting a c-section. I can't remember the whole conversation, but it had something to do with being a week overdue and sometimes the placenta isn't functioning as highly as it needs to for the baby. Everything worked itself out, though, eventually, and we were in the clear for now and they turned the Pitocin back on.

Around 4:45pm I could start feeling the contractions in my belly slighty. I told the nurse and she checked me- she said we would start pushing probably around 5:30ish. I must've looked like a deer in headlights, because she said, "It's ok! This is a good thing! Yay!" and tried to comfort me... I was super nervous now. Really?! I'm going to have to push this thing out, now?! I'm scared!!!!

I started needing to push just before 5:30. The nurse came in and she and Matt got me started. Three hard pushes with each contraction for a count of 10. I will take this moment to state that Matt is the most wonderful, phenominal man in the entire world. We went into this thing thinking he could just sit up by my head and not have to see anything... we were both content with that. But it didn't really work out that way. He became my full on birth coach, counting, telling me how great I was doing... and he saw a lot more than he had bargained for. A lot more. Pretty much everything. And it totally didn't phase him. He was so encouraging and wonderful... I can honestly say I don't know if I could have done it without him.

So... I pushed. And pushed. And pushed some more. The nurse was practically yelling, "YOU'RE DOING GREAT! She's right there! Push HARDER! Push HARDER!" I wanted to rip her face off a couple of times and I felt with every push like my face was going to explode. I know I threw up again at some point, but it was the least of my concerns at that point. The doctor, Dr. Hsu, came in (my doctor was not on call that day, so she wasn't able to deliver me, but Dr. Hsu was the sweetest, gentlest woman... I'm so grateful that it could be her if it couldn't be Dr. Grouse) and I knew we were moments away from meeting our little girl. I did end up needing an episiotomy (if you don't know what that is, then be thankful) and almost right after she did that, I gave it a few more pushes and Kathryn Elizabeth Conrad made her debut appearance at 6:27pm!!! I heard Matt say, "Oh my gosh..." in an awestruck voice (I think it was awestruck, but it could have been more of a grossed out reaction to the madness that had just gone down).

Kathryn started crying immediately and they put her on my belly. I have never felt an emotion like I felt at that moment. I was so struck by love and amazement at this little, crying bundle squirming around on my belly... she was incredible. I couldn't get it together- I just cried and cried. They let Matt cut the cord then took her over to the warmer to weigh her, clean her up and suction the goo from her nose and mouth. The nurses kept saying how beautifully pink she was and sounded genuinely impressed at how cute she was already. The nurse, Mary, kept gushing about how beautiful she was. I was proud :) I couldn't have cared less about being stitched up and all that at that point... the massaging part hurt a bit, but I was so focused on watching Kathryn and watching Matt watch her. It was so amazing.

I could hear the whole gang outside the door waiting to come in and meet her- all our friends and family. After they stitched me up and got everything cleaned up, Matt and I spent some time just with her. We knew everyone was waiting to meet her, but we needed some time. Not too much later, we opened the door and let everyone in. My mom and Matt's mom came in first... my mom was so overtaken with emotion. I'll always remember the look on her face. Then came my grandpa (beaming from ear to ear), Matt's dad, Ryan & Beth, Chris, Summer and Chris Baldwin. I was so proud at that moment and so filled with joy and love and thankfulness that so many people care about us and love us. Kat got passed around and eventually it was time for everyone to head out. It flew by.

They moved us up to the Mother-Baby floor around 9:00pm and Scott and Andrew were there waiting to meet Kathryn. We visited for a while and they oohed-and-awwed at how cute she was...

then they left and it was just us. Our family of three.

Recovery has been fairly easy... I'm a little sore, but nothing unusual. Kat is such a good baby, and I am amazed every time I look at her. Breastfeeding is hard- really hard! I never knew how much work it is, but I know it is what is best for her. We're learning together. The nights have been pretty long- last night was better and I know it only gets better from here. Matt is the best daddy ever. He is so patient and gentle with her and is so good to me right now. I can't imagine how hard it would have been to come home, only to have him go to work everyday and leave me with her alone. This first few days home has been a learning experience, but so wonderful. She is such a great addition to our family.

So today is Thanksgiving. The day of our original scheduled induction. Kathryn is in her swing, Matt is sleeping in (he deserves every minute of it) and I am here, counting all the things I have to be thankful for on this national day of Thanks. I can't even begin to count my blessings, as there are so many. I can't wait to head down to Matt's parent's house in a few hours, where my mom and grandpa will join us, for our first holiday with our daughter. We have so much to be thankful for.

My cup runneth over!!!

Could it be possible...

2007-11-17T10:50:00.000-08:00

...to sneeze this baby out? Seriously... I have sneezed at least 20 times this morning. Maybe that will get things moving. Pray that I can sneeze myself into contractions!

The Final Countdown

2007-11-16T10:29:00.000-08:00

Well... I made it to the OB appointment I was hoping to not make it to. Dr. Grouse checked me out and I am still not dilated and nothing is changing. She wasn't comfortable scheduling me for an induction this weekend, since my cervix (sorry- had to use that word) isn't ready so we had to go into next week. They couldn't get me in before the holiday, so it looks like I will be having a baby on Thanksgiving Day. I can't believe it. People have joked with me that I might be eating Thanksgiving dinner in the hospital, but I always scoffed and said, No way! I was sure- SURE!- that I'd have my baby before that. I think I fated myself for this! As we left the Dr.'s office, she said, "Now that we have that scheduled, you'll probably go into labor on your own!"

Good Lord... I hope she is right. I really hope. A lot.

Monday I go in to the hospital for a Non-Stress test (NST). They will hook me up to a fetal heart rate monitor and give me an ultrasound to make sure the baby is still happy and healthy and that my amniotic fluid levels are still normal. Assuming everything is normal, we will proceed with life as normal... if anything is wrong, I'll be induced that day.

I imagine everything will be fine (no reason to think otherwise), so that brings us to Wednesday. I'm scheduled to go in at 2:00pm to have Prostaglandin gel put in place. I'll be vague about that one... but basically it gets things prepared. Then I go home and rest up in preparation for Thursday.

Thursday: Thanksgiving Day. I'm on the schedule to be at Hoag at 6:00am. Now, I have to call ahead and see if they have room for me... if they are very busy, I could be pushed back to later in the day. Great. So at some point on Thursday, I go to Hoag, get settled in and they pump me full of Pitocin (oxytocin) to start contractions and get labor going. Inductions usually take hours... so I am guessing Kat will be born that night.

I managed to hold it together in the doctor's office yesterday, but once we were out and the elevator hit the first floor, I couldn't hold back the tears anymore. I'm so overwhelmed, tired, sore, and generally OVER being pregnant... I couldn't believe we would have to be waiting another full week. I can't sleep, my back hurts, I'm all swollen... and then... Thanksgiving Day?! Really?!! That means every plan that had been laid for the family as far as Thanksgiving goes was all messed up. I lost it... cried a lot (poor Matt)... then had a raging headache for the following 12 hours due to my stuffed up, tear and snot filled sinuses. Sweet.

Someone told me today, "Perhaps you just need to relax and not think about it. That is when it will happen." Ohhhhhhh- that is it! I will just stop thinking about it. That is super easy. Right.

So today after I get home, I am going to take a good, long walk and then maybe work on Kat's scrapbook. I've been begging God to let me go into labor this weekend, but I know his will is bigger (and better) than mine, so we will see. The thought of showing up at church on Sunday makes me even more emotional... I am haunted by the knowledge that I will be bombarded by everyone with such classic comments as:
"You're still here?!"
"When is that baby coming out, already?"
"What are you doing here?!"
And the ever popular, "Are you still pregnant?!" I don't know if I can handle it. I've been toying for hours over how I can successfully get in and out of church without being seen or noticed. I've never felt that way before. I can barely bring myself to answer my cell phone anymore, knowing it will be a baby status inquiry. Don't get me wrong- I love that people care and am blessed to have so many people thinking of us... it is just that I am asking "When will she be here?" every moment of everyday now and it is so emotionally draining to explain 6 times a day that no, she isn't here yet.

At least I know there is an end in sight... even though it is a full week away. She will be here soon and I will be tired in a whole new way. Right now I am just exhausted and discouraged, but all will be well soon.

We still don't have a baby!

2007-11-13T10:28:00.000-08:00

I know that no one has ever been pregnant forever, but there is a first for everything, isn't there? I think it might be me. Nothing is happening. The ladies in the office say that she has definitely dropped, and I would tend to agree since I can feel her much lower now, but other than that... nothing. No contractions. No 'visible signs' that I will spare you the details of. Eh.

So November 11th, my due date, came and went without excitement. If I had a quarter for every person at church on Sunday morning that said something to the effect of, "You're still here?!" then I would have had a free lunch, for sure. Yep. Still here. Still pregnant. Ready to do this. I was able to attend the LCGS 50th anniversary party that night, which was fun. I felt some funny twinges by the time we got home, but by Monday morning they had passed. I get these 'twinges' mostly in the evening... maybe that is when she is lowest from all my happenings of the day, I don't know, but I certainly hope it means something! And now the 12th has passed. Today is the 13th and I don't feel different than any other day besides being more irritable and tired. I took a Tylenol PM last night, which was glorious, since I only slept maybe 4 hours total on Sunday night.

We have an appointment with my OB scheduled for this Thursday, the 15th. She said if nothing is happening by then that we will talk about "picking a birthday" (also known as inducing labor). I was really hoping that we wouldn't make it to that point, but it isn't looking hopeful. I really want Kathryn to be here by this weekend. Really. A lot. We're edging closer and closer to Thanksgiving and I was really looking forward to turkey, stuffing and pie... so if I am in the hospital I am going to be so crabby!

The wait continues... I hope that the next post I make is to announce that Kat is here with stats and pictures and all. Cross your fingers for us!!!!

2 days to go? Maybe...

2007-11-09T10:10:00.000-08:00

My actual due date is only 2 days away. I have a feeling I am going to be saying Hello and Goodbye to November 11th without Kathryn making her debut. At the doctor's yesterday I was only "fingertip dilated" (meaning, pretty much nothing) and had no other signs of impending labor. I wasn't surprised... maybe a little disappointed, but not surprised.

Everyone keeps saying, "Oh, but you never know... you could go any minute! When I was pregnant... blah blah blah." So I've heard stories of women delivering early, delivering late and delivering right on their due date. What will my story be? Can't say... but my guess is late. My mom was due on October 9th and I was born the 12th, so I am taking that into consideration.

So at 39 weeks and 5 days pregnant, one's body is in a constant state of crappiness. Granted, I feel pretty good compared to some people I have talked to... I have had a lucky pregnancy. However, there are still some weird, bizarre things I am feeling that I never knew one could feel.
- Pardon the use of medical terminology here, but I've never actually been aware of my cervix until I was about 33 weeks pregnant. It has always just existed without me thinking about it. But holy moly. The first time I was bumped there by this baby, I knew it immediately. I can't compare it to anything I've ever felt, but it is startling. It stops you in your tracks... lets just say that. I was making dinner one night when it happened and let out an, "OOF!" I wasn't quite sure how to explain to Matt, with a puzzled look on his face, that I now knew precisely where my cervix was. Hmm.
- The same goes for being karate chopped from the inside on my rib cage and pelvis. Well, anatomically, I guess I'm being chopped in the pelvis and kicked in the ribs... as long as she remains vertex (the fancy word for "head down"). I've heard pregnant women talk about it. My own mother recalls very vividly- not exactly fondly- all the power kicks she received to the ribs. But I could never even imagine what it felt like until it happened. And DANG... it is bizarre. Alien-ish almost. What are you doing in there, baby?!
- As of about 36 weeks, I've been experiencing a phenomenon that makes me giggle at inappropriate times... my belly has corners! As she has started running out of room in there, there is pretty much always some kind of body part sticking out, creating a strange shape- an elbow here, a foot there... even her little butt creating an odd bulge right under my rib cage! Belly with corners... love it. Now at almost 40 weeks, the belly is never "round". To quote Mike Rowe, from Dirty Jobs on the Discovery Channel, "It is some kind of rhombus..."

So those are all the funny things... well, not really all of them, but I have used the word "cervix" enough times in this post that I will spare you from other strange details.

On Sunday, my due date, I will be sending Kathryn an eviction notice, so I hope she takes that to heart. Perhaps she has not received the memo that it is cool to come out any time now, so I will give her some slack. I'd rather not have to wait another full week, only to be pumped full of oxytocin to get labor started... come on out, Kat! Everyone is eager to meet you! And mommy wants bladder control back! Thanks so much!

Atta girl, Kat!

2007-11-01T23:05:00.000-07:00

Okay... so, I guess she was just playing games with us last week. We went in for my 38 week appointment today and talked about the possibilities for a breech baby- external cephalic version (turning the baby around from the outside) was an option, but it sounds risky, painful and not necessarily effective, so we decided we would just opt for a scheduled c-section.

She then did the normal check-ups... actually, she let Matt use the doppler to listen to the baby's heartbeat- he was a pro and found it right away :) Then she did the internal and said I am not dilated or anything, but said she could feel "something". I told her that I had felt some crazy movement on Friday night and that it felt like she was back in the same position she had always been. So, she felt around my belly then decided we should get another ultrasound to see if she had flipped back to vertex (head down).

Off to the hospital... we got our ultrasound. The technician asked what we thought before she did the u/s... I said I thought she was vertex; Matt said she'd still be breech- just to make it interesting. Well... I was RIGHT! I knew she had done it! Then we got to check out her heart and her little face for a while- the tech thinks she has my lips... who knows.

So- we have 10 days until the due date. No signs of impending labor, but I guess you never know. Dr. Grouse won't let me go too far past the 11th, so hopefully she'll be here within the next 14 days. Hopefully. I can't wait!

As of now, I am excited, horrified, worried, thrilled and pretty much everything in between. It feels fairly unreal that I am going to go through labor and delivery in the next couple of weeks and will soon be a mom. Maybe it will be real when it all happens- maybe not. Who knows... all I know is that I am ready to meet this little girl and love the heck out of her! Hooray!

Kathryn is SO grounded!

2007-10-26T10:27:00.000-07:00

Well, yesterday's OB appointment was not what I was expecting at all. I went in and everything was fine- no weight gain, good blood pressure, strong fetal heartbeat. Then she did my internal exam to see if I had dilated or made any progress. The words I didn't want to hear escaped her mouth, "Hmm... where did her head go?"

I'm sorry- what, did you just say?

She was head down just last week and the doctor knew right where she was. She said that most likely she was still head down, but they wanted to do an ultrasound just to be sure of her positioning since we're closing in on the end of this pregnancy. So I was sent to Hoag hospital, Matt in tow, to look at our little one. She started the ultrasound down low and I thought, "Oh crap... that looks like a butt." As she moved up toward my rib cage, I see a large sphere and finally said to the technician, "That is her head, isn't it?" She said, "Yeah... probably not what you wanted to hear, huh?" No. Not really.

So at 37 weeks and 4 days pregnant, we have a breech baby on our hands. Kathryn is in so much trouble. Seriously. What baby does that this close to their delivery date?! Only my stubborn daughter. So what now?

I haven't spoken with the doctor yet, and it sounds like I just sit and wait until my next appointment with her in a week. Then I guess she will check to see if Kat is still breech or if she decided to turn again... if not, I guess we could be looking at scheduling a c-section. Lame! I'm not a fan of the thought of surgery, but I guess it is what it is... whatever is best for her.

But seriously, Kat, take note- you have been warned. You'll be grounded until you're 15 if you don't bust a 180 pretty soon.

Doctor, doctor!

2007-10-18T14:16:00.000-07:00

So I am officially seeing my doctor every week now until Kat makes her appearance into the world. I'm not a huge fan of going up to Irvine every week before work, but it is admittedly kind of an exciting time. Every week I will go in with the hope that some progress will be made and she will tell me that delivery is imminent! Not today, though. No progress, no changes and baby has only dropped a little bit... she still has some descending to do. It feels like she has dropped significantly- I can actually get air in my lungs now- but I expect to see some changes in the next couple of weeks.

So we're 24 days away from our EDD (estimated delivery date). For some reason I still feel like she might come earlier than planned, but I don't know. That is probably just wishful thinking.

The Pumpkin Patch here at church is in full force and here I am: Day 4 and I already hate pumpkins again. I'm exhausted and really don't want to look at them anymore. Someone came and smashed two of them last night... and stole a big one. Nice. Why people feel like they have to do that- especially at a church- is beyond me.

This morning I had a lovely case of pregnant woman woes... I'm just so tired, so over this pumpkin patch thing, and then driving up to find a couple of smashed pumpkins just sent me over the edge! I sat here crying and wondering why, WHY, did I agree to do this again this year?! What kind of idiot am I?! I am hoping that I will have enough help tonight that I can leave around 4:00pm. Who knows?

Well, that is all the news for now... our glider arrived and everything is ready for baby! Our bags are packed, the diaper bag is prepared and I am ready to do this! Bring it on, baby!

Just when I thought it was safe...

2007-10-05T14:25:00.000-07:00

At almost 35 weeks pregnant, I was more than thrilled to be walking around without a stretch mark in sight. Just the other day I noticed two small, purple-ish spots right next to the scar from my appendectomy, but didn't panic. Well folks, today I see that they have indeed spread into two small stretch marks... just like two little arrows pointing and laughing at my scar. Jerks! Now, I don't mind a couple of little stretch marks, but now I am afraid that this will open the flood gates and my belly will errupt into a canvas of reddish-purplish lines... mama noooooooo!

Other than my tiny battle scars, I am feeling pretty well. Sleep continues to be a challenge. Even just relaxing on the couch watching TV is becoming impossible, as I can't quite find a comfortable way to sit/lay. I can't lay on my right side too much, because usually Kat is hanging out over there and her foot or knee or some random body part is sticking out and making it impossible to lie on that side. So it is left side only, and after about 3 hours of sleep I am awakened with a sore left hip and leg cramps... my body wants me to switch positions, but my baby is quite happy with the way I was. Ack.

Our pumpkin patch at church begins on October 14th. On one hand, this will be a great distraction through this last month... I won't be so focused on myself- I won't have time. On the other hand, it is a stressful event and I can't help but shake the feeling that this little girl might make an early appearance into the world. I know it is unlikely (maybe even wishful thinking), but it is just a feeling I keep getting. The baby is considered "full-term" (meaning, ready to come out) at 37 weeks of pregnancy. That is in 17 days from today. HOLY MOLY! Now, chances are good she would rather hang in there until 40-41 weeks (possibly even 42, but Dr. Grouse won't let me go that far past my due date at 40 weeks), but I feel like I need to be prepared for her to be here any time now.

The nesting instinct has set in for me... I cleaned the kitchen cabinet doors last week and my closet last night. I've been wiping down the kitchen counter with anti-bacterial wipes all the time and I get antsy when things are out of place (such as the paper plates being out on the counter instead of in the cabinet). I washed all newborn through 3 months clothes, all the blankets and sheets, the curtains and changing table covers from the baby's room. Now I am realizing I haven't washed the car set cover yet. We haven't tested out the car seat to make sure it fits in the car, but I have to assume that it does, since they would put Skye (Matt's niece) in there when Matt's mom still owned the car (and her seat was the same kind we have). Yesterday at work I felt the overwhelming urge to organize my office. I keep looking at the couch cover and wanting to take it home to wash... though I am afraid of the spiders that might be lurking behind the couch. Eww.

So... I am losing my mind. But I have been reassured that it is perfectly normal when you're pregnant, which makes me feel a little better... but just a little.

Well, that is it for now... not much longer before I'll be writing about the adventure of being a new mom, instead of the pregnancy craziness. How exciting!

And you think you're tired!

2007-09-21T14:43:00.000-07:00

I am exhausted. All the time. Everyone said you get a burst of energy in your second trimester, which I thought was total crap until I made my way into the middle of my third trimester and am now SO tired! Gah! I need a nap almost everyday now just to feel functional!

I can't sleep at night either- can't get comfortable, can't get rid of the awful heartburn that is plaguing me... and some people like to say, "Oh, that is just your body getting used to being tired constantly with a new baby!" Well, folks, that just doesn't make sense. Shouldn't my body be resting up? Storing energy for the many late nights that lie ahead? Someone explain this to me!

My 33 week doctors appointment yesterday went well. For the next few weeks I will be going to see her every other week, until about 37 weeks, when I will start coming in every week to be checked (no fun). Kathryn is still hanging out, head down, as she should be... keep hoping that she stays that way! I always thought I wouldn't really care if I had to have a c-section, but as we get closer I am really praying we can do it the old fashioned way (well... old fashion, plus an epidural). She also said that Kat's growth has evened out now, so hopefully we won't have to worry about an early induction or c-section for a big baby!

We've had our childbirth class, our Baby Basics class and Baby Saver (CPR) class so far, with one more class to go. It was definitely an experience, to say the least! I'm still totally in the dark about what to expect when I go into labor and how to know if it is the real deal, but I'm sure when the time comes it will all make sense. I think. I hope.

Our shower was amazing on Sunday- so many wonderful people came and we were very blessed to receive so many things to help prepare us for Kat's arrival. We had a lot of fun, played some games, chatted and ate great food... what more could you want? Kat is going to be such a lucky little girl and have so many people who love her... it really astounds me that we are so fortunate. Her room is looking good- still have some things to hang up and put away, but it is getting there. The glider is supposed to be coming in within the next 8 weeks- ha! I could have a baby before I have a glider, but that is ok... my fault for waiting so long.

I think that is it for now... 7 more weeks to go!!!

I've Lost Control of my Body

2007-09-12T12:05:00.000-07:00

I am 7 months pregnant and it is official- this little girl is in control of my body and everything it does and it freaks me out a little bit! As of our last OB appointment, my uterus is growing a few weeks ahead of schedule, which means we need to keep an eye on Kat's growth. Dr. Grouse said that if I am still measuring this far ahead at 35/36 weeks, we'll do an ultrasound to estimate about how big she is... if she is planning on being a biggie, they may schedule an early induction. She said, though, that chances are just as good that the growth will slow down and even out in the coming weeks, so as of right now we're not too worried. Matt was almost 10lbs. and when I mentioned this little factoid to Dr. Grouse, she assured me she would not let Kat get that big before intervening and getting her more motivated to come out... thank goodness!

Supposedly, from what the doctor can feel, Kat is already in head-down position. So that means that all this pressing against my ribcage is from feet and/or knees. Everyday she makes her presence known by stretching out those legs and making my right side- just below my ribcage- look and feel as though it might burst open... what are you doing in there, baby!?

Likewise, my lung capacity is getting smaller and smaller each week. The only relief I can get is to lift my arms over my head to create some space to take a deep breath. Other than that, this third trimester has brought some sciatica, heartburn and a return of the exhaustion I experienced in the first trimester. As I sit here, I feel like I could fall asleep on my desk at any moment... that is, if my belly weren't preventing me from slumping over and laying my face on the desk! Picking things up off the floor is starting to look quite silly... when there is a baby that stops your ribcage from flexing and bending like it normally does, it takes some gymnastics to pick stuff up off the floor. Very nice.

Well, things are going well over all... my shower is this weekend and should be lots of fun. Baby stuff is starting to collect and it is pretty crazy (everytime I see the stoller and carseat in the garage I have to think, "No way!!"). Classes at the hospital start this week... Baby Saver is on Friday and Saturday is our Childbirth class from 9am-4pm (yikes!). Should be interesting... Matt is praying for no videos of live births. He won't watch and he'll make me tell him when it's over, hehe. That is it for now... updates to come!

Kathryn Elizabeth!

2007-08-28T15:53:00.000-07:00

So we finally nailed down a middle name and are now happily announcing our little girl's name to the world! Kathryn was my grandma's name (and yes, she did spell it that way) and we just kind of liked the flow of the middle name Elizabeth... very traditional, very Biblical... we like! It also happened to be Matt's grandmother's middle name- so there you go! Our little Kat is well on her way!

On Friday, we had a 3d ultrasound! Matt scheduled it for us as a surprise and I am so glad we did it! It was amazing! She was moving, yawning and even gave us a smile at one point! Matt thinks she looks like me in my baby pictures... I can see some resemblance, and there is definitely some Matt in there, too! It is so neat... at 29 weeks, she really looks like a baby now!

On Saturday, the students from my youth group threw us a surprise shower! It was so neat! I was shocked! Matt was in on it and had me convinced we were going to a BBQ at a co-worker's place. Then, one of the youth group moms, Velda Pagel, called and said they had some baby stuff we should stop by and look at. She just happened to be in the same area as the BBQ, so we decided to stop by and look. When all the kids jumped out and yelled "SURPRISE!" I was in complete shock! I had no clue! We played some games, ate some food and opened gifts- I can't believe how generous everyone was- Kat is going to be so spoiled :) It was such a blessing!

I had my doctor's appointment today (we're down to every three weeks right now- soon it will be every two weeks) and was told everything looks great. The only thing that raised Dr. Grouse's eyebrow was how quickly Kat is growing... the past three appointments I have been measuring ahead and this time was no exception. We could have a big baby girl on our hands! She said if it continues this way, we'll do an ultrasound in about 5-6 weeks to see if we will need to induce early/ plan a c-section. When she found out Matt was a 10lb. baby, she said "A-ha!" and agreed that we needed to keep an eye on her growth. Other than that, she is already head down and has a perfect pulse! So we shall see... will we have a monster baby? Time will tell...

We have a baby!

2007-08-13T09:41:00.001-07:00

Ok, well, Matt and I don't yet, but Matt's sister, Amy, had her second beautiful daughter on Saturday! It was pretty incredible. I was at the hospital with her most of the day... she was being induced, so we weren't sure what time to expect Sydney's arrival. At 6:15pm, after hardly any pushing, Sydney was born! Mike was able to be on the phone from Iraq when she was born- amazing! Amy's mom and I were allowed back in to start taking pictures... I couldn't believe how incredible she was! She seemed so small (6 lbs. 5 oz. I think) and fragile, but definitely has a strong set of lungs on her! We all got to hold her and swoon over her for a while... it was too cool.

Unfortunately, I got very little sleep on Saturday night. I kept replaying the events of the day through my head and panicking a bit. The reality has finally struck me- that in 3 months, this baby is coming out of me and I am going to be responsible for her care and wellness... AHHH! I realized how scared I really am and how incapable I feel. What do I know about caring for a newborn? What do I know about being a parent?! NOTHING! I know it will be a learning process and things will be ok... but it is becoming so real.

We have 3 more months to go... 90 days from today is our due date. I'm officially in my third trimester. Holy smokes. This is going fast! We have her furniture all set up in her room, just waiting for her arrival. So crazy. Every time I walk by that room and see a crib, I have to catch my breath a bit. It is surreal.

My basketball sized belly is pretty cute and I am feeling pretty good overall. I've got to get out and run some errands, so that is it for now.

Only 3 More Months Left!

2007-08-10T11:46:00.000-07:00

Holy smokes! I cannot believe that 6 months of this pregnancy is already over! We only have 3 months left until our little girl is here! Things are starting to get finished... the crib and dresser arrived today and are sitting in our garage just calling to me to come open them! Unfortunately, they are shrink wrapped and set on a palette, so it would be unwise for me to try to tackle it myself! Eeek! We already have her bookshelf all set up... it is coming together in there!

This morning I took my Gestational Diabetes 1-hour test. I drank my orange drink at 8:05am and drove up to Irvine to get my blood drawn- you have to have it drawn within an hour. The lab was packed! There was a 45 minute wait and I only had 10 minutes left before my hour would be up (the doctor told me to get there 15 minutes early). I told the guy behind the counter that I only had 10 minutes, so they took me in before everyone else... I could tell some people were upset that they had been waiting way longer than me, but it had to be done... otherwise I would have had to do this all over again- yuck!

We've picked out our daughter's name, but not a middle name yet. We're waiting for a while to tell... maybe we'll wait until she is born to tell... not sure yet. I want to at least wait until we know what her middle name will be.

She moves a ton now... we looked down the other night and my belly was pointy on the left side! It looked like she was poking her head up just to the left of my belly button... very strange, but very fun! I love feeling her move- it is an amazing feeling!

Well... that is it for now. 3 more months of fun pregnant lady stuff to come!

Swallowed a Soccer Ball

2007-08-02T11:40:00.000-07:00

"Your Pregnancy Week by Week" says that this week my uterus is the size of a soccer ball. That sounds about right... my belly is pleasantly rounder these days. Last night when we went to The Simpsons movie, one side of my belly was really hard, like she was leaning up against the right side. So weird! It is cool that now we can start kind of knowing where she is and how she is positioned.

Things are going great so far... I can't believe it is already August! Only 3 more months until she is here! We ordered our furniture this past week and hopefully it will arrive in plenty of time! I am such a worry wart, though, and I keep having visions of giving birth without having anything ready for her when we bring her home! I know I am just having crazy pregnant woman fears, but nonetheless, it is still in the back of my mind.

I've been so lucky with this pregnancy and have felt pretty good the whole time. The only complaint I have is being tired pretty much all the time. Now that it is so hot outside, I definitely get tired faster. The heat is yucky, but at least by the time I am hugely pregnant, the worst of the heat will be over and we'll be heading into the cooler fall season.

Next month all the preparation begins- childbirth classes, showers, etc. It is so unreal that all those things are already coming up! These past few months have been speeding by and it feels like just yesterday I was standing in front of the bathroom mirror in complete shock at the little plus-sign on the pregnancy test.

Well, there isn't much new stuff to report, so I will leave it at that... things are going well and I am excited to see all the changes that are to come in the next weeks!!

Practicing Tae Kwon Do already?

2007-07-20T14:50:00.000-07:00

What are you doing in there, baby?! Well, we're almost to week 24 and there is no mistaking the kicks now! Matt can feel her all the time and we often get a good laugh out of watching my belly bounce around from whatever acrobatics she is performing in there. You can even poke in certain spots and feel her push back... pretty crazy. Though it sounds gross, I couldn't help but think of the scene in Space Balls where the alien pops out of the guy's belly and dances to "Hello, My Baby" on the counter. Honestly... sounds gross, but it is a bizarre feeling to have this critter moving inside of you!

We made it through houseboats safe and sound- what a great trip! I stayed well hydrated and didn't have any of those fun Braxton Hicks that I experienced somewhere around week 21... eek! Apparently dehydration can bring on the Braxton Hicks contractions... at 3:30am it is kind of scary to wonder what the heck is going on and if everything is ok! My stomach was rock hard and crampy, but if I got up and walked around I would feel fine. I figured it was just BH, but was still nervous. But, doctor says all is well and I am measuring right on schedule.

I've finally gained some weight... I was afraid of that. All through the 1st trimester I didn't gain anything. Slowly but surely, though, the scale moves upwards each time I go in to visit my doctor. I know it is normal and nothing to panic about... I just don't want to go overboard.

I think pretty soon I get to experience the "Gestational Diabetes" test. That sounds fun. Not. They have you drink this orange-sugar drink in the morning before you eat anything else, then they give you a blood test to determine if your body is doing what it is supposed to with the sugar. That is supposed to be somewhere around 24 weeks, so I assume that at my next appointment on August 7th we will chat about that.

Time is going by so fast... I can't believe I'm less than a month away from the 3rd trimester! Where is time going? We still need to pick out furniture, bedding and all kinds of baby stuff. I don't know if I am having any showers... guess we'll see! I think I am going to go through the closet in the guest room tonight and see what I can get rid of, sell, etc.

The belly is coming along nicely... strangers have started asking me when I am due, so I guess that means I finally look pregnant and not just chubby! Woohoo! My belly button is getting shallower and my scar from my appendectomy is becoming more visible (usually hidden in the crease in my belly button). Crazy stuff!

Well, I think that is all the new stuff for now. I'll try to keep this more updated!

It's Alive!!!!!

2007-06-25T22:24:00.000-07:00

Woo! Feeling that little girl moving around in there is a crazy, crazy thing! I'm not sure that I ever could have imagined what it would feel like. There isn't really a way to describe it. At first, around 17 weeks, it was kind of like popcorn popping in there. Very light, and not too often.

Now at 20 weeks, I can feel her everyday- mostly at night. I have been able to feel her from the outside only a few times, but it isn't common yet. Matt *might* have felt her last night, but he wasn't sure. He said he couldn't tell whether it was her or if it was his own heartbeat in his hand. Hehe. Soon enough it will be pretty obvious!

My head is constantly swimming with thoughts of how to decorate her nursery, what her name will be, what she will look like... I am so in love with her already! There is so much cute baby stuff out there- and the little girl stuff is so precious! Right now most of the clothes are summer outfits, so I have managed to keep it together... but woo! When those fall outfits start hitting stores, we're done for!

The belly is rounding out nicely... though I'm still not sure that strangers can tell I'm preggo and not just chubby. However, I am rubbing my belly or putting my hands on my belly so often that I guess one would deduce that I am with child. Who knows.

We're half-way to having our little girl! 20 weeks seemed soooooo far away when I first found out I was pregnant, but looking back it has flown by! I am enjoying it while it lasts... November is just around the corner and our little girl will be making her debut before we know it!